I found this question online so i am puting this question to everyone here.
so what do you think?



Should he be allowed to cheat?


please be mature about it but let your opinions be known.

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I believe in letting people do as they wish, as do I myself. Sometimes, of course, what I wish to do is kill them and they do not wish to die. This gives life interest.

If the wife agrees, I don't see it as cheating.
I think it's rather noble.
Then again, things might turn ugly.
She might get jealous, he might be away every night...

It's a tough situation.

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Hrodulf and Bjornolfr, you will not be forgotten.

And if the world were black and white,
you would be my rainbow in shades of grey.

Click 'n Play!

If I had a fantasy self, it'd be a tentacle monster.

This. It all depends on if she's really gonna be comfortable about this in the future. Plus, there might be a moment when he brings a woman home while she and the kids are there (Assuming they have kids).

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+1

I think its about time i post my opinion on this. First of all i would like to point out that is up to her however It can go horribly wrong generaly since men like to associate love and sex. He could fall in love with another woman dooming things...

Secondly there are alot of married women who do not enjoy sex but still do so out of love. She chooses not to simply because she has stoped enjoying it. There are many things that are done out of love, does a wife really enjoy doing washing up? What my point here is that not everything is done out of joy.

We can't blame him here at all, remember he didn't sign up for any of this. So if she doesn't let him do it then things are pretty doomed unless she lets him do her?
Ether way it doesn't look good...But you can't truely opose it.

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I believe in letting people do as they wish, as do I myself. Sometimes, of course, what I wish to do is kill them and they do not wish to die. This gives life interest.

This is her body and if she doesn't want to have sex, nobody has the right to make her.
You say "Secondly there are alot of married women who do not enjoy sex but still do so out of love. She chooses not to simply because she has stopped enjoying it."
Why can't the husband get by without it out of love for her, then?

"There are many things that are done out of love,
does a wife really enjoy doing washing up?"

You can hardly compare sex with doing the dishes.
By hardly, I mean you can't.

I agree sex is a major part of any relationship,
but you're making it sound like it's all there is.
He "signed up" to love her. Not lust after her.

If he can't stand it (and nothing else works), they should get a divorce.
No point in being bitter together.


I'm sorry to tell you, but you come off as rather sexist.

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Hrodulf and Bjornolfr, you will not be forgotten.

And if the world were black and white,
you would be my rainbow in shades of grey.

Click 'n Play!

If I had a fantasy self, it'd be a tentacle monster.

i'm well of aware of what i said But i was never suggesting she should do anything.
I was just saying others do that out of curtosy. I merely made a comparison, they are not similar at all quite right. Dishes thing was just out of place im not stereo typing women.
(all i was trying to get at was some things are done purely out of love nothing else, which was harshly missintepreted)

Even if she did let him cheat he might not want to do it with other women after all he did marry her.

They actually suggested that she get therapy to "fix" her on the radio.
What i may have wanted to say came out wrong but generally for a 40 year old man not to have sex with his wife in 2 years is considerd abnormal aparantly.
I made those points with full awarness that she is not obligaated to do so. He is still around because of love for her but he is not to blame right? Nether party is. However it has fallen apart because of the lack of something right?
And the "he didn't sing up for this" was my way of saying, he doesn't have to go through without something because he enterd a marrige.

You only missinterpreted my opinion in to " WOMEN MUST DO THEIR JOB!!".

I just looked at it objectively, with what i also heard and made comparisons.
I think even if the sexes are changed what i said works.

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You know its easy to not understand were i'm coming from if you jump to conclusions fast. Got to be on the look out for the feminists sociaty when i make posts

Last edited by fr33noob at 6:07 pm, May 5 2010

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I believe in letting people do as they wish, as do I myself. Sometimes, of course, what I wish to do is kill them and they do not wish to die. This gives life interest.

Justifiable? ... Er, not really.

I think they should just get divorced.

Also...Who doesn't like sex?!
Is it a physical problem, or is she not attracted to him?
Why does she suddenly dislike having sex with him?
How often did he get it before?
Are her morals the problem?
Is he rough?
What?
There has to be something.

That's like saying you don't like eating! D:

Maybe she could service him other ways.
You know?

Regardless, a divorce...definitely.

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Ok, so assuming:
1- Husband has a sex drive, he needs some kind of sexual activity.
2- Wife doesn't enjoy sex.
3- Husband having sex with another woman could potentially damage their marriage
4- Husband and wife are compatible otherwise; not interested in breaking up

The easiest solution would be, ahem, masturbating.

If they think 3 is not the case, then I agree with

So that would work.

Or if 4 is not the case, then, yea they should get a divorce.

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"It is those who know little, and not those who know much, who so positively assert that this or that problem will never be solved by science."

There are asexuals out there, you know - people who aren't interested in having sex. Some do have sex for their partner's sake, but asexuals certainly exist, and it's just as natural as any other sexual orientation. Way to marginalize us.

Back on topic, there are couples who make selective non-monogamy work. That is, they agree that one or both can partake in specific activities with specified other(s). I know a lot of people who wouldn't be able to pull that off, but if both partners agree a) to do it according to agreed-upon terms and b) that the agreement can be rescinded at any time for any reason, it can work.

Feel free to PM me on Asexuality. In fact I encourage you. I'm quite interested in knowing how it's possible that you have no sex-drive whatsoever and the mechanics of your "orientation."

Also, quote says she "hates" sex.
Not uninterested, or asexual.
:/

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Cheating is never justifiable, if it comes down to the fact that you're physical need is more than you're getting either put up with it and stop whining or find someone else. If you love them at all you can just deal with it, hands have many uses, afterall.
That just my opinion though.

If she's ok with it and they are both confident that it won't harm their relationship than I see nothing wrong with it. It's not even really cheating, just an open relationship. I do, however, think that before resorting to "cheating" they should see if they can find a way to get the wife to enjoy sex a bit more again. If she really doesn't want to then she doesn't want to, but I feel like it's not an unreasonable solution and it's far less complicated and has less possible consequences than an open relationship.

Musturbating is the same as sex? seriously i had no idea.
from your post i get the impression that you are not a guy or at least a straight one at that, because you should at least understand the sacrifice and physical torture the guy is enduring for so called love.

Well they have been togehter for 13 years. You don't just get up one morning and go "F%£k you B&^c you ain't puting out no more". Its about the love and as far as i know it is irregular for a relationship of such age not to involve sex. They can resort to other parties but devorce is not the easiest option here.

no one says she has to enjoy it, she just has to keep her legs open until he is done. For 2 years if he hasn't already started cheating, then there has to be some great love going on. Nonetheless divorce is expensive and bloody boring so if she can live with it, she should encourage his ass to sleep with other women on thier bed. Only then will she reliease the sacrifice he is enduring for her.

Last edited by J-oker at 2:47 am, May 6 2010

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"In my dream, the world had suffered a terrible disaster. A black haze shut out the sun, and the darkness was alive with the moans and screams of wounded people. Suddenly, a small light glowed. A candle flickered into life, symbol of hope for millions. A single tiny candle, shining in the ugly dark. I laughed and blew it out."

Hmmm... nope. It won't work out too well if he goes out and have sex with someone else, unless... she's really of the same mentality, shares the same views and so on about said topic.

That said, even then... there's the problem of "falling in love". Nevermind about cheating, it'd just make things much more complicated if you've got something like a "love triangle" going.

Oh well, I guess things like these happen. People develop fears over the years and then, those fears accumulate into hate of <something>, sometimes even changing their perceptions of themselves and how they view certain things about themselves and others. And then, somehow, the person you used to know is now someone really different.