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tell me what you think please

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kokokiki
Post #95805
Member

6:59 am, Nov 21 2007
Posts: 26


i want to write a manga but every time i start with a story i never finish it and iam not very talanted eather but just read the idea and tell me what you think

nothing is coming to my brain no but what the hell i will just write any thing

humans have a huge power buth they never use it unless they are really despreate and a few people really succeed summoning their inner power to take charge of the body but there are a few people who did that and died from the effect of it after their soul was freed from their body and after that the power of their souls went to holy stuff some were evil enough to corrupt the soul and another just to keep it and a bunch of people (only a few ) were collecting these souls and powers for their popuses but if the soul power entered the human body it becomes very powerful but then the body ages and die and the main heroine first didnt know about these stuff(she knew some how i still havent thought about that) but then she discovers that she is actiually a part of a land that once existed and lived her antient people with magic and stuff but this land scatered and some of these parts turned to something else becuse of the space or what ever and now she can get her old destroyed land back thanks to these souls and stuff

sorry for the crappy story /i have good stories but i thought i put a new idea here i honestly just wrote it now so dont be too harsh on me roll eyes roll eyes

TofuQueen
Post #95806
user avatar
Crazy Cat Lady
Member

7:12 am, Nov 21 2007
Posts: 1842


Erm...too hard to read...try breaking it up into actual sentences, so the reader has an easier time figuring out what the heck you're talking about. roll eyes

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Lunarblitz
Post #95808
user avatar
Member

7:21 am, Nov 21 2007
Posts: 47


Yeah...it's a bit hard to read, but I think I managed to read through it.
It honestly just reminded me of Final Fantasy VII with a mix of Bleach. If it was a little more specific I'd probably be able to say more.

ironbomb
Post #95809
Member

7:26 am, Nov 21 2007
Posts: 22


Yea.. I had trouble understanding/reading it myself.

From what I understood. Its a superpower with a heroine that knows about this power which roots back to an ancient land which existed years ago. Also about the superpower...It coexist with everyone and accessible to everyone but alot of people know how to use it(similar to nen of HxH..well alot of other things as well but first 1 that came to mind). But this power speeds up the aging of the user which leads to a faster decay in the body. Well thats about what I got ^^.

Unlike the nen idea, it doesnt branch out. Unless there is something *unique* about this I would say the idea is played over and over. But its not a bad starting point. Just get your ideas straight continue with it. I wouldnt mind reading it =).

Hmm now after reading this, I might be interested in writing my own short novel lol..Not quite a manga considering I cant draw lol.

Edit: after reading the reply by Lunarblitz..OMFG YOU too? I thought I was the only 1 that felt it was similar to ff7 lol, Thought I was only 1 lmao.

shar9261
Post #95813
Member

8:15 am, Nov 21 2007
Posts: 3


well it isn't very original but a good manga dosent depend on the story. it depends more on:

storytelling- the order you put things in, cliffhangers and anything that will make people finish it.

good characters. make original charcters that change and make progres . it is importent to have them loveable too. bishonen, biseinen and hot girls always work.

good art is something that can make somepeople read it.

comedy
good humor is somthing great that can keep alot of people reading. for some plots comedy is bad/

if it is your first manga start from something short. make a10 page story or something like that and then make some short oneshots. if you are able to do that you can start on a big story.



Wild Star
Post #95819
user avatar
Member

9:43 am, Nov 21 2007
Posts: 186


Well, to write manga maybe you have to first polish up your writing skills. Most people won't pay attention to anything that's hard to read. And you should really, really start using periods.

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Dr. Love
Post #95890 - Reply to (#95819) by Wild Star
user avatar
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3:41 pm, Nov 21 2007
Posts: 8856


Quote from Wild Star
And you should really, really start using periods.

Second that.. laugh

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Papermaster
Post #95897
user avatar
Member

3:56 pm, Nov 21 2007
Posts: 128


kokokiki you need to block out you ideas and clearly define the world that you are creating. Make rules and laws for it doesn't really matter because later on you can go back and destroy them in favor or something else.

Also you need to decide what direction you want to good like shar pointed out. You want it to be dark and gloomy? Light hearted action? etc?

example: More of a Claymore type with no humor all seriousness. A Dragon Ball with seriousness and lighthearted humor. An Oh Great type with the story starting out lighthearted with serious action but later completely throwing readers off with a complete change over to hardcore dark and maybe some gloomy with a friend betrayal.

Right now its feels like a dark gloomy medieval almost. I kind of like it. you just need to set a background then develop the characters to fit into your world.

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NightSwan
Post #122308 - Reply to (#95890) by Dr. Love
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Mad With a Hat
Member

7:39 pm, Feb 10 2008
Posts: 4583


Quote from Dr. Love
Quote from Wild Star
And you should really, really start using periods.

Second that.. laugh


How do you say that?.. I third that?^^

Yeah.. hard to read..

You say you have good stories, sooo show them^^
If that's just something you want people to judge your talent by, it's a little hard..
You should post something that you would like to write, or genres you want to write about..
And please, pleeeease, use pereiod... I feel like reading this hebrew thingi that doesn't stop, so you read it in one breath.............

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