Hi everyone, I am new here. Have been interested in manga and anime for some time. Just would like to ask a general question about the opinion of the people here on a matter pertaining to Japanese fiction, manga especially:
Why there are so many people lately who hate childhood friend romances? I mean, not specific pairings that are badly written, but the whole concept of staying forever faithful to the first love since childhood?
I once even read a topic on this forum where a poster asked for recommendations for manga where not just does the protagonist choose somebody other than the first love, but that THE CHILDHOOD FRIEND IS ACTUALLY WELL WRITTEN, IS AN IMPORTANT PART IN THE PLOT, HAS A DECENT CHANCE AT A WIN, AND THEN CLAMOROUSLY LOSES!
Such hatred really left me astonished. It's one thing to be annoyed by the presence of childhood love stories, but TO ACTUALLY WISH THEM TO BE THERE SO THE CHARACTERS CAN SUFFER really seems some form of sadistic hatred to me. And this isn't the worst case: I have already lost count of insults towards childhood friend romances I read all over internet.
Really, hating and cursing the whole category as a genre, just because 2 people managed to preserve their tender love from the most innocent period of their lives.....
Sorry if I start my presence on the forum with a complaint, but I really needed to share my sadness with somebody interested in Japanese fiction as I am.
So what's your opinion on the matter?

Last edited by Hobgoblin2014 at 8:51 am, Mar 25 2014

Well, I think we need to define that there are two separate questions here:

1) Why do people dislike the genre as a whole?

2) Why do people hate the "concept of staying forever faithful to the first love since childhood"? (which I think is debatable in itself)

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1) The reason people don't like the childhood friend genre is that is cliche and has been done to death. They are predictable to the point that you actually have to ask for specific examples of series where the 'new person' DOESN'T win. People get tired of the same lazy writing where you can recycle the same story, change the character names and call it a day.

2) I don't think anyone has an issue with the concept of 'being faithful to their first love' - it's usually the actions (or inaction) of character themselves that people dislike. The childhood friend loves the main character but does NOTHING about it. Fine, she want to keep those pure feelings to herself that's her business. However, when the new person is introduced, all the friend ever seems to do is play the victim and lament how they've known each other longer so they should the person beside them.

Their reasoning is wrong. When childhood friends are together for so long they strengthen the bond of that particular relationship even further - they have a strong and deep friendship relationship rather than a romantic one. People joke about a 'friendzone' but it's the most accurate way of putting it. The ultimate goal is to have a relationship with the main character. The new girl starts at zero and must only move forward, while the childhood friend must work to overcome the paradigm of being viewed as only a friend. She must put in a lot of work to approach a point where the main character could even begin to view her as a romantic interest.

I believe people are annoyed when the childhood friend becomes complacent with the expectation that their loved one will eventually be with them - through zero romantic effort on their part. They take it for granted, put no work into it and then act surprised and hurt that things don't go their way. The only impetus for the childhood friend to act is the introduction of a new character. No one likes someone who acts the victim when they could have done something to prevent it.

Last edited by 7godeohs at 1:47 pm, Mar 25 2014

Does the "childhood friend winning" plot really happen so often in manga? I am asking because I am rather new to the manga; in anime, for example, there are only a few cases in which there is a "definitive win" for childhood friends (by "definitive win" I mean when the fact that they get together is shown, not just implied or left for the viewer to decide).

the post above covers it pretty well.

I don't have anything against childhood friend romances (cfr), but you often have some kind of character of said friend that is just plain annoying or

as for the concept:
it is pretty unrealistic, even for romance manga, I mean everything changes immensely after childhood, especially your emotions. the probability of keeping that kind of "love" is very low (apart from the fact that it probably isn't even love at that age, more like a deep friendship).

take that and who on earth really has such close relationships for such a huge amount of time? There are a lot of topics and plot devices that can easily be related to real life experiences, that's about impossible for childhood friend stuff. It's so unreal, it isn't even worth thinking about it. People don't like to be reminded of something they DON'T have, you may find your prince charming or princess whatever, but your childhood friend love story is unobtainable because, well if you read this, you aren't a child anymore...

That said, Imo that plot device was one of the most ridiculous things ever tried in manga. It makes it very hard to relate to the characters, unless it is really well executed with outstanding personalities.
but hey, there still are exceptional works out there, but as the average is obvious average, cfr are on average below average


edit:
depends. often they are only used as plot device to confront the MC with the notion of rejecting someone but "haven't-seen-you-in-years-childhood-friends" have pretty good chances of getting the guy/girl

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But even if it's unrealistic, what's wrong with that? For example, when we read fantasy: dragons, elves, magic etc doesn't exist, yet that doesn't prevent people from enjoying it. I mean, many unrealistic things are very beautiful and optimistic and it would be a really good thing if they existed. I personally think it's one of the most cute and adorable things ever when childhood bonds are maintained throughout the lives, and the fact it is almost non-existent it's a very sad thing that makes the world worse. So it's good if it does exist in fiction, at least when well written, fiction doesn't necessarily have to be realistic.
To be honest, childhood friend romances are the only ones that really touch me on an emotional level. Others I may like, but I almost never take it seriously to the point of being depressed when one of them ends badly or tragically in fiction. But when a childhood friend romance is described, and the character ends up with somebody else, I take it worse than if this character died.
Of course, I don't mean that childhood friends should necessarily fall in love. I like brotherly/sisterly relationship plots too, but if we are talking about romance, then childhood sweethearts are always n.1 for me.

yeah the difference between these would be the foundation.
if you read a fantasy book you think: oh everything will be totally unrealistic, magic, dragons yay!
if you read something about a cfr, the setting would often be school life and your everyday environment.

of course people are different, but it is always better if you can somehow understand the characters.
you already know that you won't get kidnapped by a fire-breathing, vacuum-cleaner-riding witch, but still try to be immersed in that existing world. If even in that world someone would do something completely illogical that would seem strange and you'd probably put a certain distance between you and that character.
that works similar in a more realistic story.
the difference is that you can't sell fire-breathing as realistic, but you can do that with cfr.
really hard to describe... somehow it fakes being realistic?

and as I said it often depends on how good the characters are and the person reading it.
I want to understand the characters when I read something. Good personalities, in the best case even explanations WHY that characters likes that person, would be great, but being friends since grade school really isn't one. Neither is being protected by some kind of big dog when they are still below that dog's size (save for mammoth-dogs I guess). Taking the cfr joker as excuse why someone is in love with another is as bad as taking the love-at-first-sight card. It's just lazy.

________________
in need of romance?
uncommon, sad, sweet