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Previous Poll Results
Question: How close are you to your dream job?
No job, so still dreaming - votes: 1119 (33.8%)
Light years away - votes: 692 (20.9%)
Quite far - votes: 565 (17.1%)
Halfway there - votes: 331 (10%)
Getting close - votes: 308 (9.3%)
I'm living the dream - votes: 175 (5.3%)
I made it and then lost it - votes: 44 (1.3%)
Retired already - votes: 79 (2.4%)
There were 3313 total votes.
The poll ended: February 27th 2021
Now of those without a job, is that because you're a student or unemployed?
» mallika23 on February 27th, 2021, 11:55am
This question is a bit hard, but I think I'll still choose my family. They don't always understand me and we sometimes fight, but they're always there when I didn't have anyone to rely on.
» calstine on February 28th, 2021, 7:04am
Not because "Blood is thicker than water" or some BS philosophy made by society to belittle any relationship that isn't founded on the basis of marriage/a couple in a romantic and sexual relationship + their children, but because my family (immediate family, at least) are genuinely good people who love me - even though they get on my nerves 50% of the time - while my so-called "friends" are opportunistic back-stabbing jealous a-holes I keep around only because society would brand me a freak if I didn't have any friends 🙄
» zarlan on February 28th, 2021, 10:01pm
That makes absolutely no sense, of any kind.
Why spend time with people you despise, and who have no regard for you?
Why be so concerned about being branded a freak? …and how would that be worse, than having to be with your "friends".
(who, BTW, are not friends. They are merely people you pretend, to society, are your friends. Actual friends, are people you genuinely like and like to be with and whom you care about, and who feel the same about/towards you)
» residentgrigo on February 28th, 2021, 11:06am
» Shippou_Incognito on February 28th, 2021, 2:25pm
» Transdude1996 on February 28th, 2021, 2:57pm
Going by everything that I've seen and heard, you're only going to have two (Possibly three) real friends in your life, one of which you'll be married to; then you have the handful of people you can confide in, relate to, work with, and/or respect, but they're not people who you'd consider to be in close relations to in all circumstance; and everyone else outside of those two circles are just people who you can only tolerate for a certain amount of time, and need to eject once that time limit has been reached. Meanwhile, in comparison to family, I have heard nothing but regret from people who didn't attempt to at least have some regular communication with their family members (Despite whatever issue they had in the past).
Excuse me for my ignorance (Because I don't know the circumstances surrounding your life), but if they're that manipulative, self-centered, narcissistic, poisonous, and harmful, why not try to make friends elsewhere or make an attempt to leave that environment altogether?
» zarlan on February 28th, 2021, 9:55pm
You choose your friends.
Your family is forced on you …forced, in that it's forced that they are family. Not in that you have to actually have anything to do with them. (after you become an adult)
…and also, there is a problem in the question, in that it regards the two categories as mutually exclusive.
They most certainly are not.
» achyif on February 28th, 2021, 10:15pm
How could I decide? They both take very important but different roles in my life! One cannot fully replace the other.
» Jooles on February 28th, 2021, 10:18pm
But only in the context that that can mean whatever. For me, it's my actual blood-relations. For many other people, a la the average sitcom, it's their friends. Or both. Or their (MC/) gang. Or their football team.
But the answer is always family. If you choose to look at the word through my lens.
This poll is shit, damnit. Polls need more nuance.
» dreamer00013 on March 1st, 2021, 4:43am
Not bitter at all. #familyforever #loveuSis
To be a tad bit more objective - it depends on your family. Mine is not perfect, but we hold together. If someone needs help, we help each other. That's what's important, be it family or friends.
» zarlan on March 3rd, 2021, 1:45am
Your family is. Not everyone's.
Then they were never really your friends, in the first place.
» dreamer00013 on March 4th, 2021, 4:21am
And that's the thing: in the end, you'll value those more who stand by you in bad times. I figured my friends would, and was disappointed. My family was there and will continue to be there.
And I'd like to believe that said friend didn't used to be that shitty, but people do change and go through phases. You can only act upon it and watch where it goes, I believe. Either way, she was a very precious friend once that used to actually be a friend.
» Sugarshark on March 1st, 2021, 8:49am
my kids are terrible people and I love them for it; they're just like me
everyone else can go pound rocks
» hkanz on March 1st, 2021, 10:53am
1. Close family (parents, sister)
3. Most strangers
4. People who use the weather for small talk
5. Men who hover outside lingerie stores in malls and you're never certain whether they're being pervy or waiting for someone
6. Extended family
7. Social media influencers
8. People who let their guard dogs run unleashed onto public roads
» HikaruYami on March 1st, 2021, 11:30am
I love my immediate family. They're some of the actual best human beings I know. But that makes me also consider them my friends, which is why I spend time with them, talk to them, etc.
If my family were toxic, I'd cut them the fuck out. And they know that. I have no time for bullshit, especially nazi bullshit. So many people I see tolerate absolutely garbage parents into their 40s for no other reason than they feel some kind of obligation to them "because family". It's so backwards and gross to me. But if you were to use Jooles' nonsense interpretation of the world, those people would just no longer "be family", even though this poll is *obviously* referring to blood relatives when it says "family".
Anyway, in case people didn't figure it out, I chose Friends, of which my immediate blood relatives happen to be some of my closest as well.
» zarlan on March 3rd, 2021, 1:56am
Parents have an absolute obligation towards their kids. They brought them into the world. They have the responsibility to keep them safe, and guide them towards becoming proper healthy (incl mentally) independent adults. A responsibility that they have, until such a time that the kids have reached that goal.
They have no rights, to decide what friends, hobbies, likes, Significant Other, or desires the kids must have or not have (with a few exception: They should discourage them from being friends with nazis, or joining a cult or the mafia, and the like)
I am especially sickened by people who talk as if, or in some instances explicitly state, that the kids are owned by the parents. Owning another human being, is slavery.
The kids have no responsibility, "debt", or gratitude, owed towards their parents, for being born. They had no say in being born, and never asked for it. (not that they don't like being alive, but that's beside the point) The parents decided to have a kid …or were careless. Either way, it's their own decision, for themselves.
As for any responsibility/"debt"/gratitude owed, for having been taken care of:
That is the absolute minimum required responsibility of the parents. You don't get a prize, for not being horrible and irresponsible.
» Transdude1996 on March 3rd, 2021, 10:12am
Directly contradicts this:
» Yask on March 3rd, 2021, 3:37pm
» zarlan on March 4th, 2021, 10:49am
How/where is there any hint of a contradiction, in that, whatsoever?
» Transdude1996 on March 4th, 2021, 1:00pm
This presents the paradox: how can a parent be authoritative, responsible, nurturing, and raise their offspring if they cannot dictate or judge who their child interacts with, what activities their child can participate in, and what opportunities their child sees accessible and possible to pursue?
» Jooles on March 3rd, 2021, 9:15am
» energizerbunny on March 1st, 2021, 3:13pm
I agree with HikaruYami. You can have family who are also your friends and conversely, you can have family who are lame and not friends. Thinking about a worst-case scenario, I would also not care to spend time or effort for "family" who may just want to take advantage of me or waste my time being toxic. If my friends were no longer friends for any reason, they would no longer be a part of my life, and I don't see how that's different when considering someone you happen to share blood with. For someone to remain a friend, regardless if they're blood-related to you or not, that is the basis on which I would value them.
I'm guessing some people just think it's bizarre to consider a dad or a mom also a "friend", so they draw a clear divide there, but still feel the need to give weight to the affection they consider for these close individuals. Personally, I just think generally of the term "friends" and don't feel to withhold that title from my family, either.
EDIT: Oh. I didn't expect to see comments about 'fake friends'. I personally don't tolerate those. I would just consider those people "acquaintances." I wouldn't consider fake friends a variable at all with this poll.
» Aremon on March 1st, 2021, 3:51pm
» toshirodragon on March 1st, 2021, 4:58pm
» Joese on March 6th, 2021, 4:00am
But It's true this poll is too reliant on our interpretation of family and friends.
» redlinks on March 5th, 2021, 2:48pm
» Quinatsu on March 6th, 2021, 5:37am
» licorice on March 6th, 2021, 8:01am