The summary barely has anything to do with the actual content of the storyline, so be prepare for some sort of surprise. I was. After reading this, I honestly felt drained. The art was uninspiring to read at first, but it does get better around the 3rd or 4th volume. From the second volume to the last volume, this aching, unsettled feeling was with me as I read the story. The first volume is a typical shounen-style student-falls-for-teacher-esque manga—I'm going to assume that the author didn't expect to get further than a volume with this manga, hence, why it seemed to lack a flow when I read it. However, things start to heat up with volume two, especially the development between Kazumi and Ukyou-sensei.
So, basically, the important aspect of this manga is about Ukyou-sensei's past with his former lover, Tsukiya, and his growing feelings of “something” for Kazuki. Although I realized how realistic Ukyou-sensei's inner turmoil in choosing between Kazumi and Tsukiya was, I just can't seem to let this sense of betrayal I felt when Ukyou-sensei first had sex with Tsukiya disappear from me. It really irked me, although I understand that, at that point, Ukyou is still very much in love with Tsukiya after the 10+ years of separation, and that he hasn't fully developed the same feelings for Kazuki at that point in the manga. But still, seeing how Kazuki easily forgave Ukyou also irked me, although I can understand that he might have thought that if he rejected Ukyou-sensei at that point, his relationship with Ukyou would end right there and then. Kazuki must had realized that to be with Ukyou-sensei was to accept everything about Ukyou-sensei—even infidelity. But, I couldn't help the echoing “Bastards!!!” from escaping my lips at Ukyou and Tsukiya.
At this point, I hated this manga because I actually understood the motives behind Kazuki's actions, and Ukyou's actions. I dislike both the characters (plus Tsukiya) at this point in the manga, yet, it allowed me to see the development in character growth—more so in Kazuki's case than Ukyou's. At the beginning, Kazuki was just a typical, short brat but his physical and mental growth was really noticeable and at the end of the 5th volume, I couldn't help but think that Ukyou didn't fight for Kazuki at all. I know that Tsukiya kidnapped him to Hong Kong, but it didn't seem as though Ukyou was unwilling to have sex with Tsukiya again, even when he was supposedly in a “relationship” with Kazuki (I mean, they were going on a “date” when he was kidnapped, after all). By not even protesting against having sex with Tsukiya caused another eye-rolling moment for me. Maybe the author chose to not show it, but knowing Ukyou, he probably succombed easily, and he barely gave Kazuki any thoughts besides, "I must see him before I can decide which man I love more." I just couldn't care about Ukyou's happiness at this point anymore, considering that it was at one of the last volumes of the series so I expected more...character development from him at this point. I know that it wasn't his fault for the situation, and that Tsukiya was to blame for his inability to let go of the past, thus, the unresolved feelings Ukyou still has for Tsukiya. But still, it made me gagged upon seeing how much Kazuki was willing to do for Ukyou by asking his father for help, flying to an unknown country to find Ukyou, and confronting Tsukiya headon without wavering, despite knowing how powerless he actually was and then compare Kazuki to how weak and spineless Ukyou was. I just had to roll my eyes.
I know that Ukyou warned Kazuki that events such as him making love with Tsukiya might occur again in the future after the first time he had sex with Tsukiya, but I didn't expect him to still let it happened after the first time. I was really disappointed in Ukyou because I expected him to at least fight for Kazuki, or at least proved why he deserved to be with Kazuki. Even till the end, it felt as though Kazuki was the only one fighting for the relationship. I know that he was the one who forced Ukyou into it, but sheesh, just when it seemed like Ukyou had developed some kind of feelings for Kazuki, it just felt flat, as though Kazuki's love was strong like a waterfall, while Ukyou's love was as strong as a five-year old boy pissing into a toilet. At the end, when Ukyou finally made the decision to be with Kazuki, I still felt resentment toward him because his love for Kazuki was still too under-developed to be worthy of Kazuki. It seemed like Ukyou only chose Kazuki because Tsukiya treated him like a toy doll, but, at the same time, it feels as if Ukyou decided to “settled” with Kazuki because he was the "safer" choice, which I just can't seem to go along with. Not to mention, his, 'I'll love you to death," to Tsukiya at the end left a frown on my face and I just couldn't stop glaring at him. It felt as though he dirtied Kazuki's love for him by saying those words to another man with Kazuki outside the room. It made me wondered if Ukyou even felt 1/10 of those feelings for Kazuki, and why didn't he simply go with Tsukiya if he's always going to be loving Tsukiya alongside Kazuki. It just felt filthy, as though ht was desecrating Kazuki's pureness with his filth. Bleh. Ukyou just seemed shallow to me and he left a bad distaste in my mouth. I understood his love for Tsukiya, but to what extent can I, as a reader, forgive him for hurting Kazuki so many times due to his indecisive nature and lack of backbone? Thankfully, Kazuki does a better job at forgiving than me since I could care less about Ukyou toward the end of the series as he lost most of my respect for him.
Although I finally read the last chapter in English, Ukyou's “love” still doesn't feel strong nor real to me, at least, not to the point where I am at peace with Kazuki being with him. Kazuki was perfect towards the last two volumes, too bad Ukyou couldn't match up with him in any aspect, in my honest opinion.
Anyway, this is a manga that you should only read if you're willing to accept infidelity from one of the main characters. Is it understandable that Ukyou made love with another character besides Kazuki? Sure, I mean, everyone is not perfect and can succumb to weaknesses when they are vulnerable. But, does it make me like him anymore than before? No. The look on Kazuki's face matched perfectly with mine when I read those awful pages and I felt as though Kazuki let Ukyou off too easily. It ALWAYS seemed as though Ukyou never had to work hard to get the upper hand in every situation in the series, and Kazuki always has to somehow earn bits and pieces of Ukyou's "love" while Ukyou never had to do anything to earn Kazuki's affections. Love is blind, as the saying goes, but does it have to be so pitiful? Apparently, yes. Ukyou might be older than Kazuki, but Kazuki is way more manlier and mature than him. It irked me a lot at how indecisive Ukyou was up until the very last two chapters of the series. I mean, really? He's supposedly "beautiful" through the eyes of the characters in the manga, but I find him undeserving of Kazuki's brilliant magnificence that outshines him lightyears away.
I suppose that some people won't agree with my rant, but this is what I feel about Kazuki and Ukyou's relationship. I liked Ukyou at the beginning, but he started to degrade as the series wore on until I had to almost skip his parts or else I wouldn't have finished the series.
Overall, the art is mediocre, the storyline is angsty toward the end, and the character development for Kazuki was better than expected. It's not a fluffy yaoi manga so don't read it if you expect love to conquer everything and that the protagonists' story will be rainbows and butterflies. There aren't many graphic scenes, although there are sex. The side characters are enjoyable in their own rights, although I would have liked to read more about them, especially Izumino—who was, sadly, one of the few rare females in yaoi mangas I’ve read that I enjoyed completely. I dislike Ukyou-sensei's weak personality when it comes to Kazuki, but then again, he's enjoyable when it doesn't come to love. Kazuki can be annoying at the beginning, but he solidifies into a good, solid man toward the end. I think this was one of the injustice in this story when a 17/18-year old student overshadows a 27/28 year old teacher in all aspects of strength and willpower, and yet, the teacher still makes it seem as though the student is unreliable and childish. It's astounding, really. I read this manga once, but I wouldn't want to read it again unless I stumble upon it by accident. If not for Kazuki towards the end, I would have given this a solid 5, but because of him, this story deserves a 7.5.
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