Dating: McDonalds analogy
16 years ago
Posts: 170
I guess this is why sometimes people are hesitant to take a friendship to the next level. They don't want to lose what they have.
I agree with the analogy. I've been friend-zoned before. It's even worse when it involves a coworker, because avoiding them becomes hard 🤢
16 years ago
Posts: 574
Everyone knows that McDonalds has the best damn fries, but they're not good for your health, so you're better off without them. Do not pay 6$ when you're only getting 4$ worth. That only leaves you giving more and receiving less. Just because you can no longer have the fries, does not mean you do not want the fries. This is unjust, McBitch usually does not understand...But I do.
-Wendy
16 years ago
Posts: 707
So lovestruck people would rather give up a friendship then feel bad about their rejection? How lame...
16 years ago
Posts: 1901
Sometimes I can't eat a whole big mac with the fries and the drink. It'll give me a stomach ache. So I'll ask for it without the fries...
But if I'm still paying the same price, it'd piss me off.
16 years ago
Posts: 79
well I think you went to McDonald's for the big mac and not the fries, right? So the fries are just a lagniappe. So why does it really matter if you have the fries or not?
What i'm really saying is that I think you are dating the person so you can be with them because you like that person right? and that's the big mac. The fries are the romance. Some people come for the whole combo, and that's mainly just lust, and if they want that then they probably didn't like that person much to begin with anyways. But that's different from needing to be a part for a while, which is understandable.
i would never date someone who I am not friends with first, and when we break up we always stay friends, oh except for that last guy, but that's because I found out he had a kid, and an ex-wife. 😐
16 years ago
Posts: 574
Quote from Tsubaki21
well I think you went to McDonald's for the big mac and not the fries, right? So the fries are just a lagniappe. So why does it really matter if you have the fries or not?
Well when the next customer gets the fries, it's got to be pretty hard. McDonalds doesn't understand that it's going to make you upset with the service, and that giving you part of the meal doesn't make up for it -- especially when they want you to stick around and wait for them to hand their fries out. Fries are what makes it come together, it makes it a combo. The fact that McDonalds expects you to be happy with their decision is probably why their service sucks.
16 years ago
Posts: 79
Quote from mewnbrite
Quote from Tsubaki21
well I think you went to McDonald's for the big mac and not the fries, right? So the fries are just a lagniappe. So why does it really matter if you have the fries or not?
Well when the next customer gets the fries, it's got to be pretty hard. McDonalds doesn't understand that it's going to make you upset with the service, and that giving you part of the meal doesn't make up for it -- especially when they want you to stick around and wait for them to hand their fries out. Fries are what makes it come together, it makes it a combo. The fact that McDonalds expects you to be happy with their decision is probably why their service sucks.
I've decided. It depends on how much you pay! you shouldn't expect someone to get better service for you at the same price, so you pay less for less service.
16 years ago
Posts: 180
Basically what happens most of the time is that after you have been with some one for a while, one partner decides that there not in to the relation ship anymore and break it off the other person still probably has feelings for there now ex-partner and it would be very weird and kind of painful and very tempting to be around that person who you still have feelings for but cant act on them even tho you have done so in the past. This doesn't apply to guys only, in fact i think this happens more often to girls than guys. And this only happens when one person still has feelings for the other if both feel the same way they usually stay friends unless the relation ship ended in a big fight or something complicated like that.
16 years ago
Posts: 1354
The analogy's pretty clever, but I really dislike the idea that it's women who don't understand this. I think it goes both ways - just depends on the person, not the gender. I mean, in my case it was a guy who couldn't understand why I didn't want to be friends anymore. shrug Both men and women face this problem. And... I guess I'm not in favor of comparing people to fast food? Lol.
Quote from Binturong
So lovestruck people would rather give up a friendship then feel bad about their rejection? How lame...
No, see, it's about the NEXT relationship you're planning to have. Most people - male or female - don't really like it when the person they're with is still regularly meeting up with or maintaining a "friendship" with an ex, especially a recent ex. They may pretend to be ok with it but they're not, it only puts strain on the current relationship, and the cracks go deep into the foundation of that relationship over time, leading to a total collapse. Trust me on this.
The only exception is if there's a good reason to keep meeting with the ex, like maybe you had children with the ex so some kind of contact is necessary, or you work at the same place. But anyway otherwise there's no need to maintain contact let alone a friendship with an ex, or it will damage your current/future relationships AND the current/future relationships of the ex. It's bad for everybody, and will only lead to hurt feelings on all sides.
Plus, it makes it easier for both parties to get over each other if they just come clean with "no contact" - at least for a significant period of time after the break-up. I wouldn't mind meeting amicably with an ex say 20 years in the future when we're both settled in relationships with our life-partners that we've been with for 15 years lol. But I definitely wouldn't want to meet as friends only 2 months after a break-up when we're both trying to find other ppl. That will just undermine our efforts to find someone new, because it sends a signal to other people that this person isn't ready for a new relationship - or at least a very serious, totally committed relationship with a new person. No one wants to be mistaken for a rebound, and I sure as hell don't want to put anyone else through being a rebound! It really sucks. Again, trust me on this.
So it's best for everyone all around to no longer be friends after a break-up. That also signifies the seriousness of the relationship. The deeper your feelings are (or have been), the harder it is to "turn back the clock" on those feelings. Of course if it was a less serious relationship or even a casual fling, then "friendship" is still possible afterward. But if you loved someone with your heart & soul then it ain't that easy to let go and still be friends. With that level of seriousness, you just have to let go.
If you're still very young & it wasn't a life-or-death kind of serious relationship then you can still pull out and be friends, even after just a short while. But I wouldn't recommend it for anyone more mature or with a greater emotional investment in the relationship. Staying "friends" after that kind of break-up just isn't on. That shit HURTS, y'all. If not for you, then for the other person - and if not for either of you, then for the people you'll both be with in the future.
This is sage advice from someone who's been down the rabbit hole a couple of times. Lol!
16 years ago
Posts: 1444
im not a dude...
but if you became friends after that its gonna get awkward and not a lot fo people offer their friendship manytimesw after the breakup...maybe.. 😐
oh please do click this!
The sweeter the apple, the higher the branch. The quieter the fart, the nastier the smell.
GUESS WHO??
Member16 years ago
Posts: 3457
Quote from shaggievara
Sometimes I can't eat a whole big mac with the fries and the drink. It'll give me a stomach ache. So I'll ask for it without the fries...
But if I'm still paying the same price, it'd piss me off.
Then go for the medium combo instead of the large 🤣
And I think I get what it's saying now, and it makes sense. Only thanks to The Guy though, he explained it pretty well.
16 years ago
Posts: 617
Since we're on the topic of male-female relationship analogies, I think this one might make sense to a few people.
A woman has a close male friend. This means that he is probably interested in her, which is why he hangs around so much. She sees him strictly as a friend. This always starts out with, you're a great guy, but I don't like you in that way. This is roughly the equivalent for the guy of going to a job interview and the company saying, You have a great resume, you have all the qualifications we are looking for, but we're not going to hire you. We will, however, use your resume as the basis for comparison for all other applicants. But, we're going to hire somebody who is far less qualified and is probably an alcoholic. And if he doesn't work out, we'll hire somebody else, but still not you. In fact, we will never hire you. But we will call you from time to time to complain about the person that we hired.
from bash.org
I think it's pretty funny, and quite true as well.
Do but despise reason and science,
The highest of all human gifts -
Then you have surrendered to the Devil
And must surely perish. - J.W. von Goethe
16 years ago
Posts: 910
lol it makes enough sense. maybe that's why it's no. i thought it was just cause it would be awkward (trust me, it is)
Lalala~
16 years ago
Posts: 79
I think it's more akward to not be friends afterward, you just need a few boundaries, I mean we're definately not as close as we were before we dated, but since we have alot of similar interest we see eachother around sometimes and it would just be akward if our friendship had ended after we dated. Also I don't think its true about guys just being friends because they are romantically intrerested in a girl. I have married guy friends. I've had guy friends I've been interested in and haven't been interested in me. I think that's only when you're younger that it's like that. It also think it depends on the girl, what are her interest, intellect etc. If they don't have anything in common then it's probably just like that, but I'm a bit of a tomboy myself so I have alot of things in common with my guy friends, and I can cook!
16 years ago
Posts: 1310
Is not like you decide to move to another city just to avoid contact, but when the rules are set clear (I am not your friend, so if something good or bad happens, DON'T call me) then everything is better.
Really; it only has happened to me once, and the girl didn't understand why I decided to completely cut her... but it was the best to do... for me at least... I really don't care how she felt, because in the end it was her choice, the only thing i did was to set the consequences of her decision.
