Ask the opposite gender

16 years ago
Posts: 245
Quote from jinx_you
Quote from aneste
Quote from LunaMay
Question- When/Where should you not say I love you?
So many people just throw that phrase around. I've heard it countless times from both males and females, and I actually wonder if people think about these kinds of things before they even say it.just don't say it to a guy/girl you just met yesterday...
i don't believe in love at first sight and i see it as an insult to my character..
i am actually very careful about saying i love you. actually i don't even say me too", when someone i don't really love says "i love you" to me. for me, i love you is only preserved for my really really loved ones. and most of the my bfs are not even in that list.
I have never said it.
To family, yes. To anyone else, no. Because people say it way too much. Say it when they don't mean it. And say just to say it. To me, if you've said it once, you've said it one too many times. Actions speak louder than words. I would rather be shown that you love me rather than be told. Words can be hollow/shallow, actions are not.
This was my ex. He would constantly say 'I love you', and the only way he'd shut up was if I said 'me too' or something.
Plus, if you never say 'I love you', and everyone knows it, when you finally do feel like saying it, it'll have so much more of an impact. And it'll be so much more believable. Heck, I even try to not say it when i'm talking about daily things. Like, "i love ice cream!" I do, but you know what I mean... : )
"I've seen a look in dogs' eyes, a quickly vanishing look of amazed contempt, and I am convinced that basically dogs think humans are nuts." -John Steinbeck

16 years ago
Posts: 1027
Quote from LunaMay
question inspired by jinx's post^_^Question- When/Where should you not say I love you?
So many people just throw that phrase around. I've heard it countless times from both males and females, and I actually wonder if people think about these kinds of things before they even say it.
Never said it...even though I've been in looong relationships, I actually am in one now...but I think she knows me good enough not to pressure me into saying it....Or maybe she thinks it's implied.
...and I do believe deeds say more then words and all that...well, whatever, as long as I don't have to talk about feeelings 🤣
If the sea were made of Whiskey and I was a duck
I'd swim to the bottom and never come up

16 years ago
Posts: 7
There is a girl I like and we hang out at every chance possible, but she has a hulking mass of muscle for a boyfriend. Also, before they started dating, I asked her out but she said she thought of me more like a brother. I would like input on what I should do next. Should I wait out her current relationship, or should I be bold and try and break them up?
If you were forced to choose between sacrificing your life for your beliefs or sacrificing all your beliefs for your life, which would you choose?

16 years ago
Posts: 1619
If she's not already inclined toward liking you, trying to break them up will only make her angry at you and quite possibly ruin your friendship entirely. Since you've already made her aware of how you feel, to attempt to break them up would just make you look childish.
If you want a chance, you've got to get past her image of you as 'like a brother' and show her that you're more than that - but not by trying to break her and another guy up. You have to continue to be a good friend. That doesn't mean you have to like he going out with him, nor that you have to be around them if they're doing things you don't want to watch/know about. But whatever your good qualities are, put yourself in a position to demonstrate to her why you're the one she should be with. Compete on your own strengths, not by sabotage.
The main thing to remember is it's up to HER to decide, not up to you. To attempt to decide for her means you really don't care about her, just yourself.
(The stuff that most girls like to read about in shoujo mangas - yeah, most of that doesn't actually work in real life.)
If you've ever thought or said "Nice Guys finish last" and really meant it, then you should probably read this LJ post by DivaLion. It's incredibly insightful whether you're male or female.
From a bumper sticker I like:
"If you're gonna ride my ass, at least pull my hair."

16 years ago
Posts: 385
Quote from chessmaster101
There is a girl I like and we hang out at every chance possible, but she has a hulking mass of muscle for a boyfriend. Also, before they started dating, I asked her out but she said she thought of me more like a brother. I would like input on what I should do next. Should I wait out her current relationship, or should I be bold and try and break them up?
Um, she already said that she considered you like a brother. There are usually 2 things that people mean when they say stuff like that. The first is that she doesn't like you and is trying to be nice. The second is that she really does consider you a brother.
I have a few friends (well 1 really) that I consider my sister. I spend alot of time talking with her. I would not date her.
Sorry if that seems harsh, but I think you should really give this up. The fact that she already rejected you once and has a boyfriend now makes it seem very unlikely that she'll change her mind.

16 years ago
Posts: 1145
Quote from chessmaster101
There is a girl I like and we hang out at every chance possible, but she has a hulking mass of muscle for a boyfriend. Also, before they started dating, I asked her out but she said she thought of me more like a brother. I would like input on what I should do next. Should I wait out her current relationship, or should I be bold and try and break them up?
You should never break anyone up for selfish reasons. And even more so when it's someone you care about. When you truly care for someone, you place their feelings above your own - even if it means you're getting the "short end of the stick." If you can't be happy for her and want her happiness, then (not to sound mean) you truly don't care for her. It sucks when you care for someone in a way that isn't mutual, but that just makes it even more important to cherish what you already have. If her feelings are mutual for you, then she'll make the decision of her own free will to be with you.
If it weren't for the gutter, my mind would be homeless.

16 years ago
Posts: 28
..ill just ask you girls.. what do you think about premarital sex? i mean..do you prefer it or not? 😕

16 years ago
Posts: 1619
I'd suggest you go read the "When did you lose your virginity?" thread. That question's answered many times there. =)
If you've ever thought or said "Nice Guys finish last" and really meant it, then you should probably read this LJ post by DivaLion. It's incredibly insightful whether you're male or female.
From a bumper sticker I like:
"If you're gonna ride my ass, at least pull my hair."

16 years ago
Posts: 28
tnx dude ill check it out allright.. 😀

16 years ago
Posts: 1138
What is the best way (line used) to break up with someone?
Take into consideration time and place.
And no, I'm not asking for me, just curious. 😛
~I honestly didn't know that guys actually use the line "It's not you it's me..." until it was used on me. Which sucked since I really liked the guy.

16 years ago
Posts: 1619
There is no good way to break up with someone. Just be honest, and give a real answer as to what isn't working for you.
"It's not you, it's me" implies something isn't working, but people generally like to have some idea of what went wrong, and that phrase leaves them hanging.
The reason it happens so much is that many people don't actually examine the situation enough (internally) to know what the problem is - they just know there's a problem and they stop examining at that point. That's why "it's not you, it's me" is what comes out - they really haven't figured it all out in many cases.
It would seem to me that it's more common from guys (less-introspective in general), but then I only dated guys, so I'm sure that's biased.
If you've ever thought or said "Nice Guys finish last" and really meant it, then you should probably read this LJ post by DivaLion. It's incredibly insightful whether you're male or female.
From a bumper sticker I like:
"If you're gonna ride my ass, at least pull my hair."

16 years ago
Posts: 1138
Quote from Liria
The reason it happens so much is that many people don't actually examine the situation enough (internally) to know what the problem is - they just know there's a problem and they stop examining at that point. That's why "it's not you, it's me" is what comes out - they really haven't figured it all out in many cases.
Oh wow. Never thought about it that way. 🙂
Yeah guess there really isn't a good way, unless it's a mutual feeling.

16 years ago
Posts: 163
ok i dunno if this is the right place but it kinda fits. ladies if the guy your dating has somewhat different religious views from you AND your family would that end up being a big problem for you?
It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives.
When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car.

16 years ago
Posts: 1230
Quote from Berzer
ok i dunno if this is the right place but it kinda fits. ladies if the guy your dating has somewhat different religious views from you AND your family would that end up being a big problem for you?
I dated a religious guy, who went to church every Sunday and I [and my family] don't care much for religion, but it was never a problem. He did his thing and I did mine.
Unless the guy forces his views on me, then I see no reason why I shouldn't date him. I guess it also depends on the girl [and the influence of her family] on how open/close minded she is.

16 years ago
Posts: 28
..i just wana ask for advie..uhm..you see in any relationship i had taken, i always seem to lost love easily..i get bored for 1 girl and look for another..it all started when my first girl broked up with me..i know this sounds crazy..but at least you could throw some advices