This won't end well...

Tough call. I would say that letting him go elsewhere for his kicks would be nice of her (as long as he's safe, in case they ever do later), but she might wind up on the short end of the stick if he decides to leave her. If he does, it was probably a big enough compatibility issue to be a problem even before she let him go.

Maybe this is an "If you love [him], set [him] free..." situation.

Quote from fr33noob

We can't blame him here at all, remember he didn't sign up for any of this 🤣 .
...
And the "he didn't sing up for this" was my way of saying, he doesn't have to go through without something because he enterd a marrige.

I beg to differ. He chose to marry her. He DID sign up for it, even if he didn't know all the details. That's what being married means: working out your issues within the marriage.

If she is OK with him seeking sexual gratification elsewhere, then it's not cheating (imo). But if she's not OK with it, then either she should give in to him, he should give in to her (and go without), or they should get divorced.

(I don't blame him for wanting to seek sexual gratification he's not getting, but he DID sign up for it, so the least he could do is cite 'irreconcilable differences' if neither party is willing to give in.)

Quote from mewnbrite

Also...Who doesn't like sex?!
...
That's like saying you don't like eating! D:

There are people who aren't as stimulated by sexual contact as most are, and there is a huge range of sexual appetites, from all to nothing. The same as there are people who don't particularly enjoy the act of eating. I'm not sure what her case is in particular, but these could be valid answers.

If you've ever thought or said "Nice Guys finish last" and really meant it, then you should probably read this LJ post by DivaLion. It's incredibly insightful whether you're male or female.

From a bumper sticker I like:
"If you're gonna ride my ass, at least pull my hair."

@Liria

Well i was just pointing out he doesn't have to stay but i see what you mean.

[img]http://i1114.photobucket.com/albums/k528/fr33noob/on3winged9.jpg[/img]
I believe in letting people do as they wish, as do I myself. Sometimes, of course, what I wish to do is kill them and they do not wish to die. This gives life interest.
[img]http://www.nodiatis.com/pub/26.jpg[/img]

Well, the thing is.. we don't know who's choosing to stay married: the husband or the wife? And why they choose to do so? Or if divorce has been filed, who is choosing to reject it and why?

There's an endless range of possibilities and I'd rather not speculate too much. 😛 But whatever and whichever they are, they do affect the issue in a lot of manners.

I say either the wife learns to stop being a selfish, boring, and frigid bitch and learns to compromise or she should get ready to lose her husband. What she isn't willing to do there are plenty of other women who would be quite happy to. He's her husband. Not a manslave/wallet. Now if he knew about this before they got married that's another story. Still..as husband and wife they should want to make each other happy. Compromise.

Quote from Whatever

I say either the wife learns to stop being a selfish, boring, and frigid bitch and learns to compromise or she should get ready to lose her husband. What she isn't willing to do there are plenty of other women who would be quite happy to. He's her husband. Not a manslave/wallet. Now if he knew about this before they got married that's another story. Still..as husband and wife they should want to make each other happy. Compromise.

Holy cow, you're REALLY jumping to conclusions about their situation when such details weren't present in the initial story.

If you've ever thought or said "Nice Guys finish last" and really meant it, then you should probably read this LJ post by DivaLion. It's incredibly insightful whether you're male or female.

From a bumper sticker I like:
"If you're gonna ride my ass, at least pull my hair."

Well, if the both parties are aware of it, I can't consider it cheating. It's called an open relationship. And a lot of people have them. Some, not successful, others are. It all depends on the people. For an open relationship to actually work you not only have to trust one another, but you have to be extremely secure in your feelings for one another. It works as long as both parties keep the mind set that it's not an emotional attachment but purely for the physical satisfaction. And that you're always honest with one another. But there's also the aspect that for love, a physical relationship isn't necessary. Love is an emotion. And if you stop loving someone over the fact you don't get to bust a nut, well, I have to say, your love is somewhat shallow.

If it weren't for the gutter, my mind would be homeless.

If you love someone you would never want to hurt them.
Cheating hurts, wither someone admits it or not.

And is it REALLY so hard to be celibate? Like really?!
People act as if they will die if they don't cum once a day.

[img]https://www.yourgimmick.net/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2018/09/banner1.jpg[/img]

Quote from Kitteh_13

If you love someone you would never want to hurt them.
Cheating hurts, wither someone admits it or not.

And is it REALLY so hard to be celibate? Like really?!
People act as if they will die if they don't cum once a day.

If the woman doesnt mind it means it doesnt hurt. I know people that have open relationships and are just fine with it =P

I chose the Hell No answer. Sex is just 5% (told by my prof) out of the 100% love. Why did she even marry if she's just gonna let the guy go that easily. Note that this is just my belief.

I do feel sorry for the guy though, lol. But he should have think twice before marrying such a woman.

Quote from ejo

I chose the Hell No answer. Sex is just 5% (told by my prof) out of the 100% love. Why did she even marry if she's just gonna let the guy go that easily. Note that this is just my belief.

I do feel sorry for the guy though, lol. But he should have think twice before marrying such a woman.

I understand you're emotional sentiments about the matter.
However i think it would be nice to explain your opinion in better detail.
Sex is only 5% in contribution to love then why would you choose, hell no?
A 40 year old man that has not had sex for 2 years will most likely feel sexual frustration.
An open relationship will conquer this, with no hard feelings since they still love each other and according to you since its only 5% apart of love then they should be fine right?

That last sentence would be a suggestion based on the logic of your opinion. How is she letting him go?It's only 5% right? Anyway it is better to explain it in a way that makes sense.

[img]http://i1114.photobucket.com/albums/k528/fr33noob/on3winged9.jpg[/img]
I believe in letting people do as they wish, as do I myself. Sometimes, of course, what I wish to do is kill them and they do not wish to die. This gives life interest.
[img]http://www.nodiatis.com/pub/26.jpg[/img]

Oh, I forgot about the poll. I wouldn't vote for either of the option. Neither option is justified: cheating won't really make things better, "not cheating" won't help either since it's a "sex-related issue" as there's not just the woman's "feelings" to consider but also the man's feelings.

And should the man be choosing to not cheat on her out of consideration or love or some other complicated thoughts/feelings, that doesn't necessarily exclude ... using .. porn to satisfy his urges.

Quote from Kitteh_13

If you love someone you would never want to hurt them.
Cheating hurts, wither someone admits it or not.

And is it REALLY so hard to be celibate? Like really?!
People act as if they will die if they don't cum once a day.

Actually, that's not true. At least in my personal experience. I dated a guy that travelled for work, so he wasn't often home. And well, after awhile my schedule got to hectic to fly out when he wanted some. So when he got the 'itch' I told him to go scratch. As long as he was honest about it I didn't give a flip. And he always was. And it worked out great. So open relationships do work. Just not for everyone.

If it weren't for the gutter, my mind would be homeless.

Quote from NightSwan

This is her body and if she doesn't want to have sex, nobody has the right to make her.
You say "Secondly there are alot of married women who do not enjoy sex but still do so out of love. She chooses not to simply because she has stopped enjoying it."
Why can't the husband get by without it out of love for her, then?

"There are many things that are done out of love,
does a wife really enjoy doing washing up?"

You can hardly compare sex with doing the dishes.
By hardly, I mean you can't.

I agree sex is a major part of any relationship,
but you're making it sound like it's all there is.
He "signed up" to love her. Not lust after her.

If he can't stand it (and nothing else works), they should get a divorce.
No point in being bitter together.

I'm sorry to tell you, but you come off as rather sexist.

She dislikes sex?
Then she doesn't like/love him anymore...
When you like/love someone you want to spend all the time around them, and do stuff with them (sex being one of them), If she dislikes sex, that means their lives are stale and dull, and no true relationship can be healthy in such state.

I don't support cheating, so they should try new things, get away of their boring and normal lives and have vacations in interesting places... you know break the routine... if that doesn't work, then they should head separate ways.

That marriage is only making both of them suffer, so why keep it alive?

[img]http://fc05.deviantart.net/fs14/f/2007/026/1/1/Into_Werewolf_by_AbyssWolf.gif[/img]

[img]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v168/Tank_soldier222/Into_Werewolf_RETURNS_by_AbyssWolf.gif[/img]

Quote from Chaoswind

She dislikes sex?
Then she doesn't like/love him anymore...
...
If she dislikes sex, that means their lives are stale and dull, and no true relationship can be healthy in such state.

Sorry, but that's not the way that everyone thinks or is.
You're presuming.

For that matter, we're all presuming details that we just don't know, which makes the whole discussion moot, academic at best.

If you've ever thought or said "Nice Guys finish last" and really meant it, then you should probably read this LJ post by DivaLion. It's incredibly insightful whether you're male or female.

From a bumper sticker I like:
"If you're gonna ride my ass, at least pull my hair."