Hatsukoi no Atosaki

Description

Nishina is doing well at his prestigious company but after divorcing from a loveless marriage, his success at work seems empty. A chance meeting at a cafe brings him into contact with the owner, Miyama, an old high-school classmate. It seems that Miyama has forgotten him until he asks Nishina why he's no longer wearing a wedding ring and what Nishina said to him 10 years ago in high school.

(Miyama also appears as a minor character in "After a Storm", set two years before the start of this series)

Type

Manga

Related Series

Arashi no Ato (Adapted From)

Associated Names

Consequences of First Love

First Love Again

Hatsukoi no Katei

The Process of First Love

Zweite erste Liebe

Ścieżki pierwszej miłości (Polish)

ความหลังเมื่อครั้งแรกรัก

初恋のあとさき

初恋的过程

Groups Scanlating

blthings

Latest Release(s)

v.1 c.Extra (end) by blthings 12 years ago

v.1 c.4 by blthings 12 years ago

v.1 c.3 by blthings 12 years ago

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Status in Country of Origin

1 Volume (Complete)

Completely Scanlated?

Yes

Anime Start/End Chapter

N/A

User Reviews

N/A

Forum

0 topics, 0 posts

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User Rating

Average: 8.2 / 10.0 (450 votes)

Bayesian Average: 8.08 / 10.0

22%

20%

28%

17%

Last Updated

August 25th, 2023 1:04am PDT - 2 years ago

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Genre

Drama Romance Slice of Life Yaoi
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Categories

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Category Recommendations

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Recommendations

Author(s)

Artist(s)

Year

Original Publisher

Houbunsha

Serialized In (magazine)

Hanaoto (Houbunsha)

Licensed (in English)

Yes

English Publisher

Renta!

Activity Stats (vs. other series)

Weekly Pos #720

(-25)

Monthly Pos #1581

(-164)

3 Month Pos #3463

(-63)

6 Month Pos #4445

(-913)

Year Pos #5619

(-1590)

List Stats

On 234 reading lists

On 298 wish lists

On 1463 completed lists

On 7 unfinished lists

On 354 custom lists

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User Comments [ Order by usefulness ]

I dont like Nishida & the ending

by mtmt1311
12 years ago

Rating: 5.0 / 10.0

I really like this author and her longer works but I'm not a fan of this one. The story is fine but the ending is unsatisfied and I can not bring myself to sympathize with Nishida. He was cruel, selfish and opportunistic in the past. Even if I try to forgive him for what in the past, what he did even now is still selfish and insensitive as ever.

Past: He led Miyama to confess knowing that Miyama had feeling for him. He was lonely and he felt superior that the popular and cheerful Miyama paid attention only to him. But then he realized that not the attention he wants (since they're gay). He said its was Miyama fault for forcing feelings on him but he never actually tried to talk to him since he dated with the mindset that this relationship only lasted until graduation. They never had real couple conversation. They kept it as casual as ever, when it got serious, they ended having sex. At the end, he basically told MIyama: "Dude, ur not normal. Come back to ur right mind. This is crazy. Bye bye" and disappeared.
Now: He FORGOT Miyama but COINCIDENTALLY see him after the divorce (his wife started it anyway) and stick to him like glue despite the painful memories he caused for Miyama. Nishida did confess but he failed to give a proper apology or ask for forgiveness.
I really question about his love. In the past, he was afraid of the surrounding so he broke it off. Now he says he does not care about surrounding. If he is still, would be want Miyama back? Or he run away just like in the past?
I doubt Nishida is really in love with Miyama. When he saw Miyama and Ando together, his first thought was "Oh yeah, hes gay" No trace of jealousy. When Ando reveals that they're just sex buddies. He showed no relief, just his usual cold self.
Nishida said he loves Miyama now but he actually never get to know the present him really. He just kept having flashbacks of him in the past and Miyama now is no way the same as who he was in the past (Nishida's fault btw). So Nishida's confession (if it is one) really not convincing.
I feel bad for this insecure relationship. Miyama is still in constant worry of Nishida might leave him again for his "normal" life. It would not make sense if they get lovey-dovey all the sudden for what happened in the past but their reactions is still like two strangers, more like sex buddies.
Without the third party intervention, they hardly know the other's feelings. They also failed to discuss things through. Every time Miyama asked for sex, he said yes but when Miyama asked about the past or his feelings, he clams up. When the conversation got serious, they just had sex. Nishida still hiding their real relationship in front of others. He denied it right in front of Nishida. They acted just like in the past. "Reviving" first love is just a fancy way of ending this. For me, they are repeating the same mistake. One is lonely (in high school and now after divorce), the other one just blindly in love.

The end is rather dull with so many unresolved problems. After reading the last chapter, I wouldnt known that it was the end after someone told me that. It was not a bittersweet ending but rather a ending that gives you a heavy feeling, not really a fresh start. It was a realistic(?) read but I would not read it a second time. If u want a story with a hero that appears to heal the main character's broken heart or the betrayer comes back and begs for forgiveness. This is not it.

... Last updated 12 years ago

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Love it

by sandyatthebeach1
12 years ago

Rating: N/A

Hidaka Shoko is one of my favorite yaoi mangakas- her style is amazing, and her stories are never childish, overdramatic, or shallow. At the same time, if you're looking for those "awww" and "kyaa" moments, you're probably going to be disappointed. Her stories have a sense of realism to them, and are more mature... which may sound boring, but she somehow makes it not boring at all. This manga is no exception- it's gripping, yet well-paced. It makes your heart pound, it makes you feel for the characters and want to yell at them and forgive them at the same time. The art is also great, and I like the coffee shop a lot... makes me crave caffeine, haha. I really recommend this! The characters are realistic and imperfect, yet relatable... and don't think just because this is more mature, the sex scenes aren't hot. 'Cause they still are. 😉

... Last updated 12 years ago

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Lovely, heart-warming and heart-wrenching

by keyracunan
13 years ago

Rating: 9.0 / 10.0

This is my ugly summary that doesn't do justice, if someone interested to know:

Nishina Tooru and Miyama Kouhei were classmates. They didn't have anything in common until Miyama found out that Nishina's grandfather is the owner of his favorite coffee shop. Being a coffee and coffee shop lover, Miyama began to befriend Nishina, and the friendship developed into something more as he became infatuated by the latter. However, Nishina accepted Miyama's crazy love mainly to feed his superiority complex, thinking that gay relationship will only be momentarily. It was too late when he realized he was wrong, as Miyama's seriousness isn't something that could be taken easily. When their surroundings started to murmur ugly things about them, Nishina started to feel uncomfortable, and Miyama's obvious adoration to him only freak him out, and it got worse day by day . In the end he cut the relationship with some cruel words, leaving Miyama speechless and brokenhearted.
The story takes place 10 years after, when Nishina, a divorced, salaryman with dull life met Miyama who is now a coffee shop owner. All memories return, and this time it's him who begs for the other guy's love.

My opinion:
If you want scandal, plot-twist and racy sex scene, don't read this. Hatsukoi no Atosaki is so realistic that you adrenaline-lovers might find it dull. It started and ended "just like that", like a fading part in the song.
However, this is one of my favorite one-volume tankoubons up until now. The story is about trying to forgive, trying to believe and trying to give a second chance. The characters, the unspoken bitterness from their expressions, and the conversations that particularly heart-wrenching are just addictive. Nishina seems cunning and opportunistic, but you can't help but pitying him for his pitiful life, and adoring his persistence. Miyama is one of those people who live their life out of the boundary, so free that he doesn't know what he lives for.

Some quotes from the character:

"The one who takes it for real is the loser. The one who regrets is also the loser." - Miyama

"I don't know if you'll love the present me. But I love the present you, Miyama. I truly love the way you live your life, from the bottom of my heart" - Nishina

Oh, and:

spoiler

No uke and seme. They're reversible. yay.

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