Quote from Astral100

Quote from Table

lol i haven't been on much unfortunately busy with school. Nothing much else has happened between me and him so far he's pretty much just ignored me which is great ^^

Interesting. Same thing happened to me actually.
One guy in school tried to bully me, I wouldn't take it, and so we ended up fighting after school.
It was a heavy fight. We both had our faces in blood, torn clothes, bruises, dirt and so on.
I actually had heaver damage so I guess I lost this fight, but from then on whenever he saw me afterwards he would just ignore me completely. Like I am not even there.
I wonder whats with that. 🙂

Because bullies target people that wont retaliate in any way: basically theyre just cowards. You mistreat a chihahua, not even a medium size dog of any race, cause if it bites in return you'll feel pain. The key to stop your average bully is just demonstrate that you WILL retaliate: you dont have to "win", you must only make him see that youre not "a passive object to vent his frustration on". I think its linked to how childs destroy/mistreat their stuffed animals and such as a result of stress etc (very long list): then when they grow they do it to people...IF they see that there's no response.

Of course it applies only to your average joe with bad attitude: in extreme cases you HAVE to win and possibly you still will have to fight with many people, but I think this is another story.

Quote from Mamsmilk

Quote from x0mbiec0rp

Quote from Mamsmilk

I need a die with 2 sides.

That's known as a "coin".

Oh, thanks. Too much D&D.

Quote from Astral100

Interesting. Same thing happened to me actually.
One guy in school tried to bully me, I wouldn't take it, and so we ended up fighting after school.
It was a heavy fight. We both had our faces in blood, torn clothes, bruises, dirt and so on.
I actually had heaver damage so I guess I lost this fight, but from then on whenever he saw me afterwards he would just ignore me completely. Like I am not even there.
I wonder whats with that. 🙂

That's quite different from punching the bully by surprise after being bullied for some time. Of course I can't know the exact circumstances, but judging by what you've said, it seems that you acted quite bravely, as on the other hand the author of this thread acted kind of cowardly (not just the punching part).

Far-off places with sweet sounding names.

This thread needs to be locked. 🤨

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Quote from 狂気

That's like calling your enemy in the war "evil" and yourself "good". Unless you admit that there's not really evil and good, but they are just your "enemies" who should therefore be killed. Anyone can become a criminal. Anyone can murder a person, if just the circumstances lead to it. Unless you think that some people are born evil or that they are possessed by something evil (or something like that) it means that their environment has lead them to the point where they kill a person (thinking they're right, thinking there's no right, because they're crazy, because they're weak etc).

Pretty sure I mentioned the perceptions of "good" & "evil" earlier in the thread, I do not believe in them, not the universal variety at least.
Oh, I would not care about getting rid of them because they are "evil", it would be because they are a burden and lack redeemable qualities.
I am not too worried about selfishness and being altruistic, we naturally gravitate to our own needs, there really is nothing wrong with being selfish. If something were truly selfless then it would do so at its own expense, not great trait to have.
Can you imagine a squirrel instead of looking out for its own needs (being selfish) giving away all it's food and dying come winter? Biologically we are programmed to be selfish; see selfish gene theory. I just hold no illusions that striving to be somebody who basically screws themselves over somehow makes me a better person when it does not.

Quote from 狂気

Also, pedophilia is a psychological disorder. In theory at least, psychological disorders can be fixed. And even if in reality they can't, perhaps if psychology was more well developed (since it's a relatively new field) they might.

Paedophilia and a child molester are two different things. I know a lot of anime people who are attracted to loli and some the 3D kind, that does not mean they are capable of rape. I said child molesters, focusing on the aspect of rape, not the kink/fetish.

Quote from 狂気

Don't take everything seriously just because I don't use emoticons. As I said (did I?), that was years ago. I punched him because he was bullying my friend and I wanted to hurt him—I didn't really care why they were doing it. And what I was saying is that it's not a good example of violence stopping bullying. Besides, drawing conclusions that it actually solved anything is just speculation.

I personally dislike emotes, it makes the connotation of what is being conveyed ambiguous.
You hit him because he was bullying your friend? Sounds reasonable, but you did make those points earlier about how one should try to open dialogue with bullies. Does that mean you would do things differently if the same situation occurred now or previously with your current mindset?
No clue whether it was a good example or not, I do not know the specifics. I always have it open as a resort, and sometimes as a first accordance depending on the situation. Sometimes words fall short though, sometimes force sees no end to things.

Quote from Peep

I am not too worried about selfishness and being altruistic, we naturally gravitate to our own needs, there really is nothing wrong with being selfish. If something were truly selfless then it would do so at its own expense, not great trait to have.
Can you imagine a squirrel instead of looking out for its own needs (being selfish) giving away all it's food and dying come winter? Biologically we are programmed to be selfish; see selfish gene theory. I just hold no illusions that striving to be somebody who basically screws themselves over somehow makes me a better person when it does not.

But these kind of things are individual choices. At least in today's societies, it's against the principles they claim to represent. I'm not saying that societies are working as they should, or even necessary in the first place, but something like the problem with criminals doesn't work they way you say, because it's a society's problem (since they also decide who's a criminal, or "wrong", and who's not).

Quote from Peep

Paedophilia and a child molester are two different things. I know a lot of anime people who are attracted to loli and some the 3D kind, that does not mean they are capable of rape. I said child molesters, focusing on the aspect of rape, not the kink/fetish.

I don't think manga or 3D loli stuff has necessarily to do with pedophilia (or perhaps to some degree). Pedophilia is when you're attracted to prepubescent children. Pedophiles aren't always rapists or molesters, but child molesters and rapists are pedophiles.

Quote from Peep

You hit him because he was bullying your friend? Sounds reasonable, but you did make those points earlier about how one should try to open dialogue with bullies. Does that mean you would do things differently if the same situation occurred now or previously with your current mindset?
No clue whether it was a good example or not, I do not know the specifics. I always have it open as a resort, and sometimes as a first accordance depending on the situation. Sometimes words fall short though, sometimes force sees no end to things.

Knowing what's right, and doing what's right are two different things. Besides, I was not a very nice person back then—not that I'm very nice person now either.

It's a difficult thing to solve things without violence, but looking further it's usually the better one (if you can do it). But as I've been saying, it doesn't really matter whether you use violence or not, it's about the mindset. Weak person almost never solves anything in the end (even if they don't realize it). Punishment for punishment's sake rarely has any merit. You didn't feel bad about it in the first place if you didn't feel the need to punish—anger, and focusing it to something can make you forget you've been hurt, but it doesn't heal anything.

I'm not trying to say how things should be done, but rather saying not to be hypocritical or lying to yourself. Using violence is one thing, but you should know why you do it. It you don't know yourself (or don't even want to) how can you actually solve your problems (which are in the end mental problems) except by chance. Without knowing the problem and properly solving it, other people's help, violence or anything really, isn't really solving anything, it's just running away from the problems.

Far-off places with sweet sounding names.

[quote=狂気]

Quote from Peep

But these kind of things are individual choices. At least in today's societies, it's against the principles they claim to represent. I'm not saying that societies are working as they should, or even necessary in the first place, but something like the problem with criminals doesn't work they way you say, because it's a society's problem (since they also decide who's a criminal, or "wrong", and who's not).

What goes against societies' values, selfishness? Depends, some prioritize false "equality" whereas some produce people who are very much only have a vested interest in themselves. As long as it is healthy and not wholly destructive to people around them and/or the environment then selfishness is fine.
Heh, just took a law exam yesterday. Doubt legal system is much different wherever you are from. Well a fair amount of the laws we have currently are from rules by communities from hundreds of years ago. Basically local customs and rules became not so local, that is one of the reasons why we have some weird ones. Generally common law is fine, it is really legislative law that can screw you over because it has not been tested, sometimes made by people who have little knowledge on something, generally it is okay. We operate on certain precepts though, in order for a community to exist then people's rights must be respected, this includes making laws to protect them. Personally I think the whole concept of cities etc are flawed.
So yes we do decide what constitutes a crime, but most of it is common sense. People can go join another country or become stateless (will still have to abide by w/e laws in the country they reside in) if they do not like the rules of the community they are in.

I don't think manga or 3D loli stuff has necessarily to do with pedophilia (or perhaps to some degree). Pedophilia is when you're attracted to prepubescent children. Pedophiles aren't always rapists or molesters, but child molesters and rapists are pedophiles.

We could go into the semantics of pureness and innocence, but I think it is pretty much tantamount to paedophilia, especially if the 2-D, etc are erotic. If people want treatment for their disorders then the treatment is available. Some potentially unstable people may seek treatment, but a lot of say murders are done on the spur of the moment or from provocation. Not all people are mentally ill even if they are premeditating murder, some might just have anger issues. Treatment in somewhat easy to access here. Prevention is key though as we can not handle the numbers that need to be locked away.

Knowing what's right, and doing what's right are two different things. Besides, I was not a very nice person back then—not that I'm very nice person now either.

It's a difficult thing to solve things without violence, but looking further it's usually the better one (if you can do it). But as I've been saying, it doesn't really matter whether you use violence or not, it's about the mindset. Weak person almost never solves anything in the end (even if they don't realize it). Punishment for punishment's sake rarely has any merit. You didn't feel bad about it in the first place if you didn't feel the need to punish—anger, and focusing it to something can make you forget you've been hurt, but it doesn't heal anything.

People are more inclined to violence due to certain chemical reasons too, it can also then build into a positive reinforcement cycle. Yes, I recognize weak people rarely have the confidence and will to solve tough problems on their own. Still, a lot of bullies are weak mentally, they evade confronting issues that they have, few people are self reliant and will take things in poise. If you watch some children though you will see pack mentality is engrained early on, the loner is seen as disdainful, so the lack of strong willed people after going through a system of relying on others mostly is not all that surprising.

Both of you, care to take your heated and non-topic related debate onto MSN?

Quote from Mamsmilk

Quote from x0mbiec0rp

Quote from Mamsmilk

I need a die with 2 sides.

That's known as a "coin".

Oh, thanks. Too much D&D.

i got bullied and one day he use to put violence into so i cough up my money
sadly for him i was just a kid who didn't like violence it never meant i don't know how So after the tussle with me and lost face cause hes not much in strength he back off. After that he only started to glare at me when his friends around and in the end i got into a fight him with him. Lucky enough he got his ass save cause i was ready to scrap with 2 of them i didn't care if the my friends or outsider/teacher were looking i was ready to tear them apart. Booya!
p.s i was really small(height)
Lesson of the day? if your weak the only option is grow stronger
go out train go join a self defense course go scrap it out with him every day.
Bullies strive of fear. Lose it and you only gain cause you start from rock bottom. 😀

= Stress is what we Live FOR =

/===CODE OF CONDUCT===~\
|A Life For A Life|

Quote from grandexeno

Both of you, care to take your heated and non-topic related debate onto MSN?

Heated? I think it's proper creative argument, and not too off topic either (though it's drifting away bit by bit). Besides, I don't use MSN.

Quote from TimeManInJail

i got bullied and one day he use to put violence into so i cough up my money
sadly for him i was just a kid who didn't like violence it never meant i don't know how So after the tussle with me and lost face cause hes not much in strength he back off. After that he only started to glare at me when his friends around and in the end i got into a fight him with him. Lucky enough he got his ass save cause i was ready to scrap with 2 of them i didn't care if the my friends or outsider/teacher were looking i was ready to tear them apart. Booya!
p.s i was really small(height)
Lesson of the day? if your weak the only option is grow stronger
go out train go join a self defense course go scrap it out with him every day.
Bullies strive of fear. Lose it and you only gain cause you start from rock bottom. 😀

Who did what now? I have no idea what you tried to say.

Oh, looks like time up for me. To be continued...

Far-off places with sweet sounding names.

Quote from grandexeno

Both of you, care to take your heated and non-topic related debate onto MSN?

I would not call it heated per se. That would suggest we are arguing. I have MSN, but I use other IM more, can not do so round finals though; a forum is the better medium though rather than passing short sentences. Forums historically are for debating (since back in Roman times).
It is not really off topic, we are looking at the underlying causes of bullying and the solutions and their merit. You do not have to read if you do not want to.

The topic was about counseling on a case of bullying, and from what the OP said, it was solved 3 or more pages ago. Any further debate (i called it heated cause the debaters took their reasoning really at heart: no meaning of flaming here, instead they were much composed in explaining their opinion) is just Off Topic. In the end, I mean, im not a moderator nor i want to appear like one: but it feels odd to me to prolong this thread with almost philosophical points of view in a 1 on 1 discussion when the matter at hand was solved already ages ago. Just this, no ill meaning in my sentence :3

Quote from Mamsmilk

Quote from x0mbiec0rp

Quote from Mamsmilk

I need a die with 2 sides.

That's known as a "coin".

Oh, thanks. Too much D&D.

just so uall know bullying @ school is little different from what will happen when you enter th workforce - the only difference being bullies there will not only pick people weaker than themselves

it's best you come to terms with the issue earlier in life (as it doesn't just go away) and if your going to fight you need to be willing to deal with defeat at times

and in my experience, if your going to help people being bullied - be willing to accept the possiblity of betrayal 🤣 - but @ the end of the day it's whether or not you can live with what you've done or not done

Quote from grandexeno

The topic was about counseling on a case of bullying, and from what the OP said, it was solved 3 or more pages ago. Any further debate (i called it heated cause the debaters took their reasoning really at heart: no meaning of flaming here, instead they were much composed in explaining their opinion) is just Off Topic. In the end, I mean, im not a moderator nor i want to appear like one: but it feels odd to me to prolong this thread with almost philosophical points of view in a 1 on 1 discussion when the matter at hand was solved already ages ago. Just this, no ill meaning in my sentence :3

having just read this topic since it was bumped though, i'm w/ grandexeno 🙂

Once i got sick of being bullied I punched a girl a nosebleed.
and i'd do it again.

clickI THINK EDWARD CULLEN IS UGLY.click

GG WP case closed, nay?

I've never been Bullied.

But I'm all about teh vengeance. evil laugh

[color=#ff0000]"“That's the difference between me and the rest of the world!
Happiness isn't good enough for me! I demand euphoria!” "[/color]