I'm looking for a read that portrays a male/female couple (not yaoi) where the gender norms and rules get bent. cross dressing would be awesome, but I'm not exactly looking for a completely transgender relationship either.

anyone have some suggestions?

What do you consider as gender rules getting bent?

Nulla in mundo pax sincera
"Always go too far, because that's where you'll find the truth." - Albert Camus

From the top of my head, the only thing close that I can remember is W Juliet.
Also Hourou Musuko has some of that, but they are kids and it is very innocent and there is not really a bunch of romance there...

Yubisaki Milk Tea has a cross dressing guy with a lot of emotional problems, and some girls than want to get close to him, but they are not really a couple.

Ummm... If you wanted the magical variation, you can always get some classics like Ranma 1/2 and Futaba-kun Change but they are not probably what you are looking for...

Well, that is, that is all I can remember 😛

Quote from chineserider

What do you consider as gender rules getting bent?

I think he meant Gender Roles... you know, the stereotypical stuff a gender do.

examples might be like: the girl "wears the pants" in the relationship, the guy's character is sensitive and emotional, the characters don't conform to the generic male and female traits.

So... your looking for a feminine male and a masculine female?

Is this me in a nutshell?
Pretty much.
[img]http://www.dragonflycave.com/wpay/ninetales.gif[/img]

only thing that came to my mind would be "Family Compo" not sure if it qualifies what you're looking for

1/2 Prince (Novel) - Girl plays virtual reality as guy. Between her and the male lead, she's definitely the dominant one in the relationship, though the male lead gets his own moments too. It's good. ^^

1/2 Prince puts a lot of focus on breaking the gender norms, both with the main characters and the minor ones. There's a manga as well (1/2 Prince), and it's pretty good, but it has slightly less focus on the gender thing. Here's my favorite quote from the novel:

“Perhaps it’s not really for as inane a reason as proving my brother wrong that I decided to become a guy.”

“Then, what’s the real reason?”

“Maybe the real reason is that I just don’t want to hide behind anyone, not anymore.

“I want to kill monsters to my heart’s content, using all kinds of crazy methods and moves, without anyone calling me a violent woman.

“I want to swear and cuss while killing and whenever I’m pissed or annoyed, without anyone saying that it isn’t ladylike.

“I want to be able to laugh after hearing an off-color joke, maybe even add my own retort. I don’t want to be forced to pretend I don’t get it, just to prove how pure and innocent I am, but I don’t want to be called a vulgar woman either.”

im thinking Usotsuki Lily the male character cross-dresses because he hates men to the point were he would hit something if it showed his reflection.

just living my life like any teenager would, facing the world, dealing with all the things that come at me. im not the special yet not that all normal, just somewhere in the middle ground :3.

wow.
thank you all for your replies and recommendations. It seems like I have a list to go though 😃

Here's a couple shorts:

Ningyo Ouji, the title story

"Yoru no Bannin", the third story in the collection Sheets no Sukima

Ai wo Utau Yori Ore ni Oborero! is almost exactly what you're looking for! (Ai Ore in US - published by Viz) 😃

Pheromomania Syndrome goes both ways.
The couple sometimes seems traditional and sometimes reversed, if I am understanding your requirements correctly.

Witch Craft Works is a good one I highly recommend.

Otomen

[m] Seishun Otome Banchou
It's quite short though