To start off the writing in the story is bad & horribly cheesy.I felt as if the mangaka was near the age of 10 & lacked any real vocabukary or writing skill.For example In one scene it says something like "We Had sex everywhere, I've probably touched him everywhere except for his heart",probably the most cheesy bad written line I have ever read.The art is also sub par,but it was decent & portrayed what it needed to.Another thing to mention is the mangaka failed to use the panels correctly,she could have done a better job at expressing the emotions that she/he was trying to portray.The good thing I have to say is that the story was a nice idea,but it was sad that it got portrayed so badly.

I expected some dark themed story but not this. The art is rough and the "romance" starts rather slowly, so I didn't quite like it in the beginning; the only reason I continued to read was because some people rated it highly and I was curios. I still don't know if I like it, I mean, I'm not even sure I understood the big picture - the details are too intricate for me to grasp right now (being kinda late, I read the big blocks of text rather superficially). However, I did get very sad from a certain point:

While I didn't hate any of the characters, I found it hard to truly relate to any of them. Their behaviors are just too extreme and I couldn't stop myself from wondering what the %^&* were they thinking. Of course, I could understand some of their feelings, especially Fukazawa's, but to a limit. I think the title, Songs of Self-Abuse, is perfectly fitted for the story, as all there characters are abusing themselves by taking some weird, irrational steps that will undoubtedly impact their whole lives. But in the end, I couldn't help feeling sorry for them and their despairs. I wish they find happiness, though in their cases I doubt it can ever be your usual happiness.

I feel I missed important things by not being in the mood to read it carefully so in case you're picking this volume, be sure to be prepared for some long (philosophical) tirades.

... Last updated on October 30th, 2014, 2:33am

Dark, disturbing, twisted, lecherous, lustful, dirty and just... brilliant.

It's psychological. There's smell of sweat, death and semen. There's no sweetness. Or maybe a bit? Even art, how should I put this? is related to the mood of the characters, it's rougher when they're confused, prettier when they're calm. It's imprecision perfectly fits the story. Mangaka's trying to look into the darkest abyss of human soul, to unveil delusions, imperfections, doubts and eternal questions of human beings, to portray hardships of complicated relationships, to show difficulties of living in this hostile twisted world, ways to deal with painful past and in the end to show imperishable human longing to stay alive, to love ad be loved back. There's bitter-sweet taste of love. Will they find the substance? You should find out by yourself ?

I had a great time while reading. I'll do it again and then again to make sure that I understood everything (the more you know Japanese culture the more meanings you'll find). But not everyone will do so, oh no. There will be some disgusted people, maybe a lot. But who cares. At least give it a try ?

Unforgettable. One of the wildest stories I put my hands on. 10 points

... Last updated on October 26th, 2018, 1:12pm

It's just not my thing I guess...the artwork is crude and some of the scenes are gross (lots of sex). The main character is uncomfortable to watch. I didn't care about any of the characters at all, they're all sad, lonely, people and it's depressing to read about why they're like that.

The manga does make a lot of interesting points about life, but it was too much text in a manga for me. This should have been a novel. I don't know why the author decided to use his crappy scribble drawings instead.

A manga rich in philosophy, that doesn't shy away from portraying people as horrible, with sketchy art style and masses of narration. This is certainly out there for a manga in the yaoi genre! However, underneath this dark facade lies a simpler story of redemption and hope. I certainly would describe this as a tragedy.

In the beginning, the way Juuza treats fukazawa is pretty terrible. Juuza is certainly not supposed to be a likeable character, but through his narration we failed that he feels empty and apathetic, almost depersonalised. The author's writings and the characters thoughts help them to become sympathetic, and the philosophy talked about throughout this manga is understandable and largely unpretentious. Some common themes are the meaningless of being, the feeling of emptiness, and the use of sex as an attempt to control this.

If the long paragraphs of narration are a total turn off for you, this story can be enjoyed on a surface level as a story of different types of love: fukazawa is in unrequited love with Juuza, Haniya finds himself only able to be satisfied by yearning, Juuza's strange relationship with his mother, etc. Despite the fact that this story starts off very darkly (incest, death, pedophilia), the introduction of Haniya, who is one of the more relatable and normal characters, helps to end this manga on a happier note, as he helps Fukuzawa to recover from his love of the cruel Juuza.

The motifs of this manga are also interesting: the manga ka who wrote this is crazily intelligent and very intricate in her work. Look out for mentionings of flowers throughout. Also, the flower scene in the final chapter is beautifully done, and you don't need to be a genius to work out the symbolism. Light and dark is also a theme that runs through this manga, so spotting images of these is something interesting to look out for.

Basically, this manga can be enjoyed as an existential essay on subjectivity and being, or simply as a love story between three guys. Heck, you can mix these up a bit, picking up some of the deep stuff and leaving the rest. The translation team behind this beauty did a wonderful job in making this work understandable and interesting despite the massively complicated text! Well done on your commitment and fluency!

Basically, read this manga

I was reading this with the thought that the first chapter was set in the far future, the present, since Juuza was the owner/manager of a brothel. The second chapter I thought it was set before the first chapter, about a month or so, but not all that far back. Then the third, all the way back when everyone was in school, which confused me, cause I thought Juuza was much older, and I had also thought that he and Fukazawa didn't meet in school, and their first meeting was at the hospital. Then I thought, what if it was more linear then I had first expected, and that the timeline didn't spread out so much, and was to be interrupted almost exactly the way it was told? I mean, I did see the category that this was non-linear storytelling, but I had thought that Fukazawa was still in school in the first chapter, maybe because he looked so, so young.



But aside from this confusion, this manga is amazing. Lots of feels, really lots of 'em. She just blows your mind with the story. This made its way to my heart very quickly. The art style is amazing, one of the most beautiful and realistic I've ever seen. The story is actually quite a normal one, with how someone becomes in love with another, to the point of almost obsession (that's what I felt with the relationship between Fukazawa and Juuza anyway). Then they break up (they weren't really together in the first place) but he falls in love with another guy, who actually helps him find light in his so very dark life. I don't know, the concepts she choose to write about, just completely wow-ed me. I even dare to say that this could be my favourite Yaoi manga of all time. And I've read a ridiculous amount of these everyday. I don't want to talk about it for too much, because this has already been quite long. Just prepare for immense beatings to the heart when reading this.

Also, from the ratings here, and on mangafox (where I read this), it doesn't seem to be a very well liked manga. I would like to say I can understand why, but I really don't. I am a very open human being in the first place, and I can even admit that I'm kind of different from the rest of society. I'm non-judgemental to almost anything not normal! The only thing that I really don't support in terms of fetishes would be Necrophilia, cause that's just plain rude towards the decreased. What I'm trying to say is, I don't hate Juuza for being a nasty bastard, for how he treated Fukazawa. I understand Hinaya's reasons for falling in love with Fukazawa in the first place and Fukazawa's reasons for sleeping with, well, anyone. I can even say that I somewhat support them, cause that's who they are (I'm very glad most of them moved on from this though).

AND I JUST FOUND THIS SORT OF REVIEW THAT KINDA CLEARS UP THE STORYTELLING CONFUSION BUt then I found out that she didn't understand Japanese besides from the "aa" when they're having sex .. But still! The way she grasped the flow was much better than I did, so I guess reading it without understanding things is a good thing(?), though I would have never tried cause I want to understand what they're saying. Not just that but some of the lines are just so beautiful! But she really lost me at times with the sheer amount of text! Which is why I completely congratulate and commend the scanlators for trying, and doing such a great job on translating this!

... Last updated on October 7th, 2012, 5:32am

Emotionally draining with all the heavy themes of death, loneliness and hopelessness. It's quite good though, except the humongous load of text (man, this must have been a nightmare to translate, good job scanlation team) that I found amusing at first but was overwhelmed at the end. The manga kinda confuses me sometimes, but for the most part, when I really got into it, it was great even with the fountain of words.

oh my, i couldn't even imagine something so wonderful as this masterpiece exists. it's so outstanding it can't be compared to anything i've read so far. and also what a relief it is to know there are still some authors who understand aesthetics of skinny humans ^^ i love it all to the last bit, the art style, the atmosphere which is so twisted and cold it can be really called dark ambiance, and the abstract way in which characters speak and think. the slight postmodern flow is also great, the only thing i wish is that it was longer than two volumes

... Last updated on August 16th, 2012, 7:05pm

After reading the reviews I figured this manga would be right up my alley. But I was disappointed, and not for the reason you think. Being very visual, this manga was sort of overwhelming, being there is a lot of intricate reading to be done.

It is clear the work the author went through though, it's very well thought out and features very indepth observations and philosophies. While the art is not a masterpiece, it reflects the story line and mood very well. Just wish it was a bit more clean at times, since some scenes feel like an optical illusion, but that's just me.

This is quite a jump from other manga I have read of the same genre. It's much more detailed and well thought out. It's rather sad that of all the work that was put it into it it didn't receive the same amount of popularity. But personally, I think this would of made a better film that manga.

For future readers be aware that this book may cause you to feel emotions you were not even capable of feeling. Just keep an open mind and take it for what it is: an artistic expression.

... Last updated on August 15th, 2012, 1:21am

I can clearly see, that mangaka put a lot of effort into it. But i was disturbed by:
- characters with an unstable mind, I really don't understand irrational people, who is brooding all the time over some depressive ideas, deliberately pushing themselves into misery and unpleasant situations without any rational reason;
- anorexic characters (please, someone, feed them!);
- long, intricate texts, full of terms, too intellectual for a common reader (I really appreciate when one can explain oneself in simple terms).
If you are into these things (and like yaoi, of course), then go ahead and try it~!)