After graduation, I stayed home for three days straight. The only time I went outside my door was when I did the laundry in the basement.

I decided that I needed to go outside because I really felt that I was going to suffocate without getting some fresh air.


________________
March 14, 2009
Liverpool 4 - 1 Man Utd + playing at Old Trafford + all the tension + beer = A very happy Reds fan

Yes, I've been one since February.

Why?

For one, I have agoraphobia, anxiety, (severe) depression and am very, VERY paranoid. I've had all those symptoms since I was in the fourth grade.
They've just gotten worse over the years. I still haven't found a good medication after all those years.

Two, I'm terrified of being judged by other people (and pretty obsessed with my appearance). I haven't looked the greatest lately, my hair is pretty much destroyed from using a flat iron for years, I'm afraid people will laugh at me or give me weird looks or something if I got out in public.

(I've been using the InStyler for 5 months now and it's not helping, I also used that Ojon stuff which made my hair softer but didn't get ride of the heat damage. It's off subject but does it work for any one else here? Eh, back on subject-- )

As far as school, I quit in February and did homeschooling 'til June.
I'll be starting virtual school in September, which is like public school except you're doing it from a computer. My Doctor said it might make my depression and stuff worse because I'm not out in public socializing with people, but, I'm hoping for the best.

( It's pretty amazing that I still have my friends from school, I guess that's what you call true friends. )

So yeah, that's why I'm a hikikomori.


Sorry for the long story. I need to learn to shut up.


________________
[ з и м а ]
Farewell, until the day I can see clear skies.

ohhh....i was one....
i was alllllll ALONE in school.....
i didnt actually want to go out of the house.
i didnt have a single friend.
i didnt want to talk to my classmates.
i didnt go to fieldtrips.
i didnt go to school programs.
i dont have a single picture. even graduation (except when i was a baby or when i was very young)
i always sweaattttt aloooottt when talking to anyone,

hey this is reall i was one.
i know its hard........

________________
http://mybrute.com/
http://idonthaveamaster.mybrute.com/

no way that idea saddens me. there is so much of an enjoyable life and people to meet out there. its no good to stay in too long it can build depression. mental problems. and overall being anti-social. so if you r a hikimori and live around me i wouldn't mind hanging with you. the more friends the funner life is.

altho since i am a manga when i start writing/illustrating story ideas. i can be locked up in my desk for nights. but its best to get out.
i read somewhere that exploring different places uve never been. wether u like them or not is actually good for your mind. it helps the imagination and also can make ur memory last better. =)

________________
why because i am the president of the student council of course

Somewhat.

But, I do go out sometimes!

Well, I try to go out as much as possible, but the rents hold me back sometimes -___-

There are times though where i've said no to going out with my friends and I just stayed at home on the PC all night

I stay at home more than I go out. I've been gaining more freedom recently, but this is still the case.

LOL, no, i can't bear to stay in my apartment for too long without going out. Well, college parties,work, girlfriend, and many of my friends make sure of that



Wow, that sounds really harsh, i wouldn't kno what i would do without my friends and stuff.



________________
Everything has a price.

im sure u cant understand...



Last edited by mhilly1 at 7:40 am, Jul 11 2009

________________
http://mybrute.com/
http://idonthaveamaster.mybrute.com/

Seems as if you had social anxiety disorder and depression (though I may be wrong, but I've been through both so I have an idea as to what it's like), hope you're doing better now.

yes, although i do go out on friday nights

I go to college... but in vacation I don't go out >.< not even to bought food D:! It's not like I'm a Hikikomori, it's more like I could be one and don't even bother to go out again. But probably my parents would kick me out of the house

To mhilly1, *hugs* People just sucks sometimes.

I only have a few friends, but I rarely see them and we usually only see each other at school. I'm going to a different high school from everyone I know when summer break is over, so I might become a sort-of hikikomori considering I have a difficult time befriending others of my age (I extremely dislike my generation...). I plan on joining clubs and going on trips, so I'll go out of the house out of free will, but I'll probably be alone while doing it. I'm happy, so it's fine.

Up until recently I guess you could consider me a hikikomori.
at the start of this year I got in this really bad manic depressive state, even having slight suicidal tendencies
I stopped going to classes (not like I was doing well to start with) and just lazed around my apartment all day. every few days going out to buy food and once in a while hang out with my old highschool friends.

A few weeks ago I got over my depression and right now I'm looking for a part-time job to get me through the summer.
In September classes start again and this time I will do things right from the get go.

________________
Do but despise reason and science,
The highest of all human gifts -
Then you have surrendered to the Devil
And must surely perish. - J.W. von Goethe

I went through a period like that two years ago during summer vacation, my family was living abroad at the time and I just stayed home for most of that summer living off take out and playing games or surfing the net all day.

________________

yea.

im recovering right now!

i think so?

Last edited by mhilly1 at 7:35 pm, Jul 11 2009

________________
http://mybrute.com/
http://idonthaveamaster.mybrute.com/