Hi! I was looking for a topic like this but I didn't find one so forgive me if this has been done before.

The title is pretty self-explanatory, basically how do you meet and/or talk to girls (or boys if you're a girl) who share this interest irl? This applies more to meeting people of the opposite sex, but it's not limited to that of course, because I'd also like to meet anyone who's into this hobbie.

But I'd also like to ask some advice from you guys/girls for my personal "case". Well you see I'm in High School and there's this girl in school who (I think) likes anime and/or manga. I have no connection to her whatsoever (I don't know anyone who knows her, am not in her class or year etc). So there comes the question... How the hell can I meet her? I'm really shy and (it looks like) she's sort of shy and reserved too, so how in the world am I supposed to meet her without looking creepy or perverted? I keep thinking about it but I just can't come up with an answer...

I know it's really sad that I'm asking this but I'd really appreciate any answer. If you have a sort of story where you met your girlfriend/boyfriend who likes manga/anime I'd like to know about it as well so don't be shy (ironic isn't it?! ).

Thanks in advance everyone.

Normal conversation tactic: Use something you have in common to start a conversation. If you've seen said girl reading something specific, you could start a conversation about an arc in the manga you like, or what's happening at the moment, or characters you like.

So since you're basing this on similar interests, you've already got a major head start.

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"Stalk" her until she goes to the library and when she goes to look at manga, approach her, you might have common interest, and move from there...? you might run into each other in the corridors at school and hit it off... lol

Just start talking to her... as long as it's not in a creepy place or something. Be positive and assertive! But don't be pushy. Try not to scare her.

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Wow thanks for the fast replies guys!

The first two advices would be good but I really have no way of knowing what manga/anime she likes. The school library has literally 0 manga (quite depressing). But I'll still try to find out. Who knows maybe I'll get lucky and see her reading something. The thing is, in my school, manga and anime are sorta seen as kids stuff so usually people aren't very "open" about this hobby (not me though, I don't really care about what the other students think of my hobby )

@pikapu Duely noted. Assertive not pushy. Got it!

If anyone has more advice/stories/whatever fits share!

That would be easy if she belonged to the same class as him, but it's not the case.

Reii-Pii suggestion would have a considerable succes rate, but she as you mentioned is a shy girl, if she is shy she will hardly answer you with more than "yes" *laugh* and stuff at first, so you need to have a lot to talk about to make her feel more "free", and that is not the case since you don't know anything about her. I already tried something like that that but not with romantic intentions...I ended up without what to talk about. I felt that she enjoyed the conversation(laughed and all) but didn't really know what she should say.(In this one I will need girls comments, since I don't really know if that's what happened...maybe she was just thinking GTFO fucker )


Do you share kind of activity with her? Do you know any of her friends(if you do that is REALLY good)? If you don't do you think you can get closer to one?

Knowing friends is really useful.

Lol. No, I don't share any activity or know anyone who knows her (at least that I know at the moment). But indeed now that you said it, the fact that she's shy may be a bigger problem than I anticipated (was this sentence creepy?).

You don't need to have a long conversation when you first talk to her either. What I've noticed when I meet and get to know new people is we talk for a bit, leave it at that, then when we next see each other, talk a bit more and so on. Forced conversation is the worst thing, it's so awkward.

If you end up liking each other you'll talk more and more and get to know each other and bam you're off.
It's what I've noticed. It can be awkward the first time but don't let it put you off. I've had many awkward moments when I first talk with some people I've met and most are good friends of mine now so don't worry about that.

I do however, always go in with the intention of friendship when I'm talking to someone new. Perhaps it affects the way I approach a person. I don't know. Bear it mind nevertheless.

That is the most basic problem, when theorizing you always count that oportunities for talking are plenty, wich is not the case. If they where, as long as they have matching interests it would be sure that they get to be atleast friends, but things aren't normally like that.
Everyone knows to approach someone you need to talk, try not to look creepy and all but it's not as easy as that

edit2:

It's as if we are trying to kill her

Thanks for the advice tactics. I'll remember that.

And yes. Opportunities to talk wouldn't be plenty. I'm in science ans she's in arts. Students from arts have classes on special classrooms which aren't close to my normal classrooms or laboratories. Even though I think it's best to avoid the forced conversation that tactics mentioned and keep the first conversations light.

I think that the biggest problem is meeting her and causing a good impression at the first conversation. After that things may work out if I put extra effort or something like (positive thinking is good right?!).

Yes I am aware of that. I was giving my opinion of what to do if they did start talking as people have already stated ways for them to try and talk to each other. Instead of just repeating, I thought I'd give some advice of what to do after he passes that stage.
Sorry for thinking in advance.

Surely.
The major problem and probably where I failed is to know how to make the good impression without being forceful.
If you can recreate Reii-Pii's situation in another place you know she goes to a lot, and can make a good impression, with that I mean, not leave the conversation one sided and all, it will not be strange anymore for you to meet her at this same place and talk with her.

For example: If you meet her in the library and strike a forceful conversation, if you come one day after and try to talk again with her it will look creepy. But if you are able to make a real conversation, talking with her won't look forceful anymore



Pardon conceived

I guess (since high school isn't easily translated to my country's school system) that you're about 15-18 years old, and depending on which country you live in, maybe you've begun partying - yay - which is always a good opportunity to make new acquaintances. So one possibility is to get yourself kicked into a party where she is, and just talk to her there (do not attack her, bad idea). In my country, that's standard procedure, which might go hand in hand with us being one of the people whom drink most alcohol i their youth, but never mind about that.

Else, tactics' solution is the best. You just have to find an opportunity...

Well, I also have a hard time finding people in real life who have the same hobby as I, but I don't know if anyone can see that it's my hobby, since I don't openly talk about it... Actually no one knows, lol. (Maybe I'm too good at hiding it? Oh, jeez)

Hit her, and bag her... right?



"Hey, you're an art student right? Who's your favorite artist or art style?" or, "What's your favorite medium you like to work with?"

You might want to learn about some art periods before you try this.
Also, whatever she answers just show that you have a genuine interest in what she has to say by asking follow up questions that work with whatever you choose to start the question.

Last edited by Toto at 3:17 pm, Mar 19 2011

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Thanks for the new advices everyone! I deeply appreciate it, I mean it!

I just remembered one thing. I think (almost certain that) I could get the bus for the same direction as her. I didn't remember this before because I usually take a different bus (because it has less people), and because our school time table (I'm not 100% sure how you say it in English sorry...) is very different (or at least I think so, considering that I rarely see her on the bus stop). I don't know if this is an important thing but still thought I should mention it.

@Oriolidae It's a good advice, thanks! The only problem is that I don't usually go to that many parties and when I go it's always parties with my friends. And I don't think she's the kind of girl who parties a lot either. That combined with the fact that our "friend circles" don't even have 1 match makes it unlikely for me to see her at a party...

(JK) Oh boy this is hard... Oh well I can always become a stalker and live happily ever after watching her from a distance . . . (JK)